IT'S THE MOST wonderful time of the year, or it can be. The recreational use of marijuana during the holidays is one of the highlights of the season. The pretty lights get prettier, wrapping gifts goes from tedious to terrific, and eggnog becomes nectar of the gods—especially for someone with cotton mouth. Here are some tips and ideas for making this one stoney season.
TIP! At family gatherings, if you've discovered that being high is the best way to deal with Aunt Gertrude and her drunken ramblings about "Muslim-in-Chief Hussein O-harm-ya" while Fox "News" blares in the background, consider edibles over smoking. It's discreet, you won't reek, and there are only so many times you and your record store clerk cousin can make another run to the store for "more ice." Mind your portion control, lest you get the giggles during grace and end up playing with your mashed potatoes à la Richard Dreyfuss in Close Encounters. Plus, edibles travel well, in case you are heading through the woods (or through the TSA) to grandma's house.
TIP! Don't have edibles? Think about investing in a pocket vape. With a cleaner, less foggy high, you can find some models that look like the cousin to an iPhone. Or consider a vape stick like the ones from the CO2 Company. A sleek black pen with no buttons to fumble with, this device recharges via an included USB plug, and accepts cartridges that are strain specific and made from outdoor organically grown cannabis. By using CO2 (AKA dry ice), the resulting thick liquid is upward of 60 percent pure THC, and unlike many other concentrates, does not need to be suspended in glycerin. You will blend right in with anyone brandishing their e-cig, although the extraction process used retains the yummy terpenes that give the herb its smell and taste. So be mindful when exhaling.
TIP! If you have a cannabis enthusiast on your holiday gift list, consider a gift card to your local smoke shop. It's easier than determining exactly which style of wizard-riding-a-dragon multi-chamber color-changing glass bong your brother wants.
TIP! Consider holiday tipping with marijuana. That barista who knows your name and consistently gets your quad shot of ristretto soy latte with an extra pump of vanilla exactly right? Maybe she'd prefer a nicely rolled joint over your 63 cents change. As always, be cool—announcing "here is a joint of Kali Mist for you to smoke when you get off work!" during the morning coffee rush is not being cool, Poindexter.
TIP! Your grandmother does not want rose-scented lotion. She wants her arthritic hands to stop hurting. Make or buy some cannabis-infused hand cream and help her out. The skin absorbs the THC, which reduces the pain and inflammation but won't get her high.
TIP! Good will toward men comes easier when you are pleasantly stoned.