Watch a Gay Flick

It sounds like a barbaric sorority hazing ritual, but PISS is actually a film festival. The 2nd Annual Portland International Short Short Film Festival, to be precise. As you may gather from the name, all the films included are under 10 minutes long, and come from as far away as New Zealand and as close to home asÉ home.

Other than that, the films in this collection have nothing in common with each other. There are comedies in which wiener dogs who are taunted at wiener roasts finally snap, cartoon presentations of various ways you can die, tuna-fish-and-noodle-dish family dramas, lost romances, WWII historical fictions--you name it! And of course, the great advantage of all short film festivals is that if you don't like the film, you won't be forced to sit glowering into your popcorn bag for two frigging hours.

That probably won't be a problem here, though, as most of the films being shown are pretty excellent. Unlike so many shorties that come off as goofy experimentations with technique, without a lot of regard for entertainment value, these shorts make you want to see more. Give those dudes some grant money! MARJORIE SKINNER

Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 281-4215, Friday, Sept 26, 7 & 9 pm; ITISNESS, 3016 NE Killingsworth, 288-1189, Saturday, Sept 27, 7 & 9 pm, $5

Goalbusters Flock to Portland

NEWSFLASH! Another internationally popular entertainment act is coming to Portland! It's the opening rounds of the 2003 FIFA Women's World Cup for soccer!

Who could forget 1999's Women's World Cup, when the United States team, led by scoring machine Mia Hamm, defeated China in the championship game in front of more than 90,000 Rose Bowl spectators. Called by Sports Illustrated "the most significant day in the history of women's sports," the hugely popular event was capped by a heart-stopping shoot-out in which the grizzled old veteran Brandi Chastain pocketed a doozy in the upper left corner of the net to win the game. (She also ripped her shirt off in celebration--yowza!) It couldn't have been more exciting, and this year a whopping 12 of the players off that fateful lineup have returned--including Chastain, Hamm, team captains Julie Fowdy and Joy Fawcett, and the scrappy goalie Briana Scurry!

This Sunday's games feature the up-and-coming Ghana vs. Australia, and the always-dangerous Russia vs. last year's runners-up, China! The following Thursday, however, is the World Cup quarterfinals, with the heavily favored U.S. team almost guaranteed to make an appearance (they have to get past Sweden, Nigeria, and North Korea first). So enjoy some high-octane ball-kickin' from some other world heavyweights this week, but don't forget to get those advance ticks for the quarter and semifinals next week! JUSTIN SANDERS

First round World Cup doubleheader with Ghana vs. Australia and Russia vs. China, PGE Park, 1844 SW Morrison, 224-4400, Sunday, Sept. 28, 5:15 pm, $20-$65