Visiting Estacada is somewhat like visiting Latvia or Kentucky. While the locals are as friendly as your second-favorite aunt, they speak a sophisticated language that is more or less linguistically unintelligible to the average Portlander. Before you hop on "The 31" for a night out or even a visit to the new Estacada Public Library, study this helpful guide to Estacada lingo.

Clackamelt—a turkey, bacon, and cheese sandwich on rye. Can I get some jalapeño marmalade with that Clackamelt?

Gnorm's—a now-defunct café and juice bar on the NW edge of town notable as the area's sole distribution point for the Portland Mercury.

"No ice"— straight up, as pertaining to an alcoholic beverage. Don't fuck up on this one, kidz. If you order your whiskey "neat," you will most certainly be outed as a Portlander.

Raider—a student or athlete attending Estacada High School. Did you see that Raider last night on Elimidate?

SAM—an acronym for the Sandy Area Metro, which runs five buses between Sandy and Estacada daily. Does the SAM go to Mall 205?

Pounder—a pint, usually of beer. Barkeep, would you be so kind as to pour me a pounder of Schlitz?

The 31—Trimet's #31 city bus, which makes hourly trips from downtown Portland to downtown Estacada. Sheesh, it smells like someone must have croaked on the 31 last night. WG n