ZERO CHARISMA “Oh, Zorgbrol the Cruel. You’re the only one who really gets me!"

recommended All Is Lost
See review this issue. Fox Tower 10.

The Amityville Horror
I never saw this 1978 suburban horror flick, but I remember reading its Mad magazine parody, "The Calamityville Horror." So as far as I can tell, this movie's hilarious! NED LANNAMANN Hollywood Theatre.

Bad Grandpa
See review this issue. Various Theaters.

recommended Birth of the Living Dead
George A. Romero invented shambling, guts-gobbling zombies as we know them with his 1968 classic Night of the Living Dead. I'm sure your nightmares thank him. Documentarian Rob Kuhns interviews the living-dead legend and chronicles how Romero's film came to be—including stories about Romero gathering pals from Mister Rogers' Neighborhood as his production crew, and getting advertisers from his commercial film studio to play zombies at an abandoned farmhouse. It's a fascinating film that not only covers Night of the Living Dead's evergreen themes like race, war, and zombie apocalypses, but also provides a twinkly eyed portrait of Romero. COURTNEY FERGUSON Clinton Street Theater.

The Counselor
See review this issue. Various Theaters.

recommended Dead Alive
"They're not dead exactly, they're just... sort of rotting." Kennedy School.

Dracula 3D
The latest from the once-great Dario Argento. This film was not screened for critics, and also looks terrible. :( Living Room Theaters.

recommended Evil Dead 2
"Gimme back my hand... GIMME BACK MY HAND!" Kennedy School.

recommended The Exorcist
"Have you ever heard of exorcism? Well, it's a stylized ritual in which the rabbi or the priest try to drive out the so-called invading spirit. It's been pretty much discarded these days, except by the Catholics who keep it in the closet as a sort of an embarrassment. But uh, it has worked." Academy Theater.

recommended Filmusik: Turkish Rambo
Filmusik proves a live score for 1983's Vahi Kan, Yerli Rambo, "a nearly scene-by-scene remake of its American counterpart, adding a few flourishes along the way (notably, zombies and bulldozers)." Hollywood Theatre.

recommended The Golem
The 1920 silent film, presented with live, original piano accompaniment by Beth Karp. Alberta Rose Theatre.

Horror Cinema Series
A horror series including The Host, Hausu, and Nosferatu, the latter boasting a live score by Mood Area 52. Mission Theater.

recommended Night of the Living Dead
George Romero's unfuckwithable 1968 zombie flick. Clinton Street Theater.

The Patience Stone
An adaptation of the bestselling novel, in which a Muslim woman (Golshifteh Farahani, wonderful) tends to her older, comatose husband, a former soldier in a war-torn country who has a bullet lodged in his neck. Her life revolves around taking care of him—until she becomes involved with another man and becomes more self-possessed. It's a shocking movie, especially in terms of the cultural insights it offers, like seeing the life of a woman married to a jihadist—but it's also a little slow, since most of the film is a monologue spoken to a vegetable. JENNA LECHNER Cinema 21.

Reel Music
Once again, the Northwest Film Center unleashes its annual Reel Music series of music-related films upon us, and once again, there is far more than a reasonable human can see—more than 30 films will screen over a period that's just over two weeks. This year's programming boasts some really worthwhile stuff, though, and it's enhanced by the inclusion of nine early Hitchcock films, each given a live soundtrack by local musicians. More at NED LANNAMANN Whitsell Auditorium.

The Return of the Living Dead
Dan O'Bannon's 1985 comedy/horror flick boasts a perfect tagline: "They're back from the grave and ready to party!" Fifth Avenue Cinema.

recommended Samurai Cinema
The NW Film Center's samurai film series. This week's selection: Harakiri. In 1630, a wandering ronin enters a palace looking for an honorable place to commit harakiri (ritual suicide). The head of the palace is suspicious; it seems there's been a rash of harakiki-seeking ronin lately, claiming they'd like to slice open their bowels but in actuality conniving for a quick handout. This ronin means business, though. Masaki Kobayashi's 1962 masterwork functions as an indictment of the inhumanity of the Japanese feudal system, but more importantly, Harakiri is a smart, suspenseful historical thriller with some really sweet fight scenes. NED LANNAMANN Whitsell Auditorium.

Troll 2
"They're eating her! And then they're going to eat me! Oh my GOOOOOOODDDDD!" screams one of the many unlucky actors in 1990's Troll 2, a horror flick that earned its so-bad-it's-good cred before The Room was even a glimmer in Tommy Wiseau's lazy eye. ERIK HENRIKSEN Laurelhurst Theater.

The VCR That Dripped Blood
A montage of old video clips—or, as the press release puts it, "a soul-shattering psychotronic nightmare from deep within the VHS tombs of Seattle's Scarecrow Video." SOLD. Hollywood Theatre.

Voices in Action: Human Rights on Film
The NW Film Center's human rights-focused film series. This week's selections: Tall as the Baobab Tree (director in attendance), The Undocumented, and Alias Ruby Blade: A Story of Love and Revolution. More at Whitsell Auditorium.

recommended Young Frankenstein
"I heard the strangest music from the upstairs kitchen and I just... followed it down. Call it... a hunch." Kennedy School.

Zero Charisma
A film about a sad, angry Dungeons & Dragons nerd, Zero Charisma's core rule—that life is shitty and hard, and everybody just gets through it the best they can—is a solid one, and despite all its geeky bona fides (a not insignificant chunk of time is devoted to determining if the Millennium Falcon is faster than the Enterprise), it's easy to watch it as nerd-sploitation, full of groan-worthy, wince-inducing awkwardness. But those who stick with Katie Graham and Andrew Matthews' film will find a surprisingly nuanced story underneath: Zero Charisma, thankfully, never tries to make its characters "cool," but it does make them human. ERIK HENRIKSEN Hollywood Theatre.