DEAR MERCURY—Comparing Jennifer Aniston to a Kentucky Derby thoroughbred is predictable and just plain wrong, Ann Romano [One Day at a Time, Aug 26]. Julia Roberts? Maybe. Sarah Jessica Parker? Definitely. But J. An doesn't have the equine jaw line or buckteeth necessary to brand her a "horse face."



When I was 19, I studied in Scotland. Then afterward I went to Sweden to party for the summer. I stayed longer than the 90 days that the tourist visa allowed. I got on a train and didn't pay because I didn't think there would be a conductor. When there was one and the conductor radioed back my passport number, he found I was technically in the country illegally. I was taken first to the police station, then to the airport and told to buy a ticket out of the country at my own expense. Plus I was banned from Sweden for two years. Now, was I a victim of something ["MAX-imum Punishment," News, Aug 26]?

-posted by speedster1


Regarding the issue of female pubic hair and its decreasing appearance, I've never quite understood the appeal of making a woman appear to be prepubescent down there ["Pube Pride," Letters, Aug 26]. I prefer the variety of quantity, color, and pattern that comes with the display of bush. Another aspect to consider is whether the trend toward the shaved look over the years is in any way connected with the rise in child pornography, as the absence of pubic hair could be interpreted as the infantilization of a grown woman. I find this disturbing.

-posted by Iceman9


Don't you know those Prius drivers have energy-efficient fairies fly their produce/commodities in from Never-Neverland, where no one is impacted by anything ["Farm Harm," I, Anonymous, Aug 26]? How dare you use transportation that actually transports things and not just people?! Those Prius owners paid good money to buy that added feature (self-righteous indignation). Can't we all just get along? Or at least just STFU and drive?

-posted by Commonsense


As a gun-owning, gun-carrying, gun-loving, gun-obsessing kind of guy, I see the proposed gun rules as reasonable ["A Two-Front War?" Hall Monitor, Aug 26]. I really don't give a monkey's nuts about what happens to criminals with gun convictions. Gun criminals = fucking assholes who have used their weapons illegally. Fuck 'em. I love my gun, we go way back, and if I'm gonna break the law I leave my gun in the car. Just like your girlfriend, don't bring your gun to a bar fight, you may never see her again. As for my right-y pals who complain about this one: You can't have your cake and eat it too. Don't break the fucking law, and it won't be your ass on the line. Don't walk around downtown with a beer in your hand and your gun in your pants. How hard is that? As for [the Oregon Firearms Federation] (I'm a member), they get pretty worked up for good reasons in general, but this one is a no-win situation. Sam Adams is a bit of a fuck up when it comes to dating, but he has this one nailed. Don't be a bunch of typical assholes and pretend like you give a fuck about lunatic gun criminals. By the way, old-school Glock 19 since '94. No fancy grips or cute finger holds. You know you wanted to ask.

-posted by Dudeman

THANKS FOR SHARING your perspective, Dudeman. Good to know you won't be bringing your girl or your gun to the next bar fight. You might at least consider bringing the girl to share your winnings of two tickets to the Laurelhurst Theater and lunch at No Fish! Go Fish! though, where you really probably won't be needing the gun.