WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 12

STORYTELLING—Here at the Mercury, we know about the horrors of dating—so why not make a night of listening to hilarious, butt-cringing stories from Wm. Steven Humphrey and Marjorie Skinner's former dating lives? The storytelling extravaganza It's Not Me, It's You benefits Planned Parenthood, and it's brimming with hysterical guests like Project Runway winner Michelle Lesniak Franklin. CF
Mission Theater, 1624 NW Glisan, 7 pm, $18-20

MUSIC—Boise's Treefort Music Fest is a grand ol' time, but if you can't make the mid-March trek to Idaho, don't miss Prefort!, a kick-off party with great Oregon bands—Brainstorm, Thanks, and Holiday Friends—and the kind of communal, pioneering Northwest spirit that has quickly made Treefort one of the highlights of the year. NL
Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison, 8:30 pm, $6-8

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 13

MUSIC—Valentine's Eve is as good a time as any to start a statewide weekend of parties and forums aimed at making sure same-sex marriage clears this fall's ballot. Called Love Is the Message, the whole shebang kicks off at Dig a Pony, with performances from IBQT, Holla 'N Oates, and Roy G Biv. DCT
Dig a Pony, 736 SE Grand, 9 pm, FREE

FILM—One of this year's Portland International Film Festival's most powerful films, the Palestinian Omar tells the winding, suspenseful tale of a handsome young freedom fighter's personal and political struggles, amid a backdrop of graffitied separation walls and terrifying prison cells. It's equal parts engaging as it is entertaining and insightful. MS
Cinemagic, 2021 SE Hawthorne, 6 pm, $11

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 14

FILM—Happy Valentine's Day! Also, the only thing worth loving in this cold, pointless world is movies. Tonight you have two excellent choices: The Academy's showing Quentin Tarantino and Tony Scott's True Romance, while the Broad Spectrum series at the Hollywood Theatre has David Lynch's Wild at Heart. EH
True Romance, Academy Theater, 7818 SE Stark, see Movie Times, $4; Wild at Heart, Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $8

MUSIC—Sure, you can do Valentine's Day ironically, or dismiss it as so much saccharine commercial pap. But this year, why not give sincerity a shot? Treat your honey to a delicious dinner for once in your damn life, then check out Under the Covers with the supergroup the Moody Dudes, whose raison d'être is laying down tender V-Day cover jams. And hold hands for a change, hipsters. Corsages for everybody! DVH
w/Melville, Rebecca Marie Miller, & more; Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 8:30 pm, $6-8

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 15

DANCE NIGHT—Nothing makes the heart sing like go-go dancing straight outta 1969. The monthly mod dance night Shout! travels back to the groovy era to make you shake, shimmy, and mashed potato all over the delightful, wood-paneled Eagles Lodge. It will be a winter of love over there, complete with dancers, stiff highballs, and Twiggy miniskirts. CF
w/DJs Drew Groove, Hippie Joe, the Silver Fox; Eagles Lodge, 4904 SE Hawthorne, 9:30 pm, $5

VON TRAPPED—Yes, yes! Daniel Handler (Lemony Snicket!) and illustrator/author Lisa Brown are fascinating. Yes, yes! Comedian/improviser Jay Flewelling is hilarious. Yes, yes! The Doubleclicks are nerdtastic—BUT HOLD THE PHONE, because this live taping of radio show Live Wire! features Portland's greatest treasures the von Trapps (yes, the great-grandchildren of THOSE von Trapps) whose voices eclipse those of angels! (Also, some band named Pink Martini... never heard of 'em.) WSH
Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta, 7:30 pm, $20-35

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 16

MUSIC—With spectral, roaring rock, the Ghost Ease is one of the most intriguing bands in Portland, and tonight they play Rontoms' top-notch free Sunday Sessions series, not just putting an atmospheric cap on the weekend, but offering a volume-filled, dreamlike start to the new week. NL
w/Cambrian Explosion; Rontoms, 600 E Burnside, 9 pm, FREE

BIKES—Each year, the Zoobomb Mini Bike Winter lifts February beyond the realm of stolid, drizzly bike commutes and into a sphere more concerned with mayhem and jackassery. It's great. The event culminates today in the Mini Bike Winter Olympics, full of bizarre events and heated competition. Sochi's boring; ride your bike into the Willamette. In February. DVH
Laurelhurst Park, SE César E. Chávez & Stark, more info at zoobomb.net/mbw

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 17

MUSIC—Wrapping up a month-long tour, Pure Bathing Culture returns for an overdue dose of their modern magic—gently new age-y in a good way, positive and free without being corny. It's cheaper than a therapist and probably even better for you, give or take a few drinks at the venue. MS
w/Marissa Nadler; Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi, 9 pm, $10-12

FILM—Dweebs already have their neckbeards in a twist about the RoboCop remake, but don't forget: It's directed by José Padilha, the guy behind Brazil's smart, badass Elite Squad movies. Throw in a villain played by Michael Keaton—Michael Keaton!—and this thing might turn out to be the action fix you've been waiting for. EH
Various Theaters, see our review and see Movie Times

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 18

DIORAMAS!—Podcast Kick Ass Oregon History is begging you to relive the best part of grade school! Find a shoebox, construction paper, a whole mess of glue, and some old toys—and build your very own awesome diorama memorializing an appropriately kick-ass event in Oregon's history. Submit photos by February 14, and then, tonight at Stumptown Stories, celebrity judges like Cort Webber of the Welcome to That Whole Thing podcast and Israel Bayer of Street Roots will pick a winner. DCT
The Jack London Bar, 529 SW 4th, 7:30 pm, FREE

COMICS—This week at the Portland Arts and Lectures series: groundbreaking cartoonist Chris Ware in conversation with designer Chip Kidd. If you aren't a season subscriber to the spendy series, your best bet is to queue up at the box office at 5:30 pm for a shot at day-of tickets. AH
Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 7:30 pm, $33