WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 15

MUSIC—Toronto's PUP are, of course, mere pups in the grand scheme of rock 'n' roll, but their blistering, joyously great punk rock will have you dangling from the rafters and shouting along. With Slabtown's potential closure looming, you'll want to get over there for a least one more night of hectic, thrilling live music. Better make it tonight. NL
w/Phantom Family, No More Parachutes, Agents of ECCO; Slabtown, 1033 NW 16th, 8 pm, $8-10, all ages

FOOD BOOK—The currently reigning prince of American food writing, Mark Bittman, already taught you how to cook everything, and now he's back to tell you How to Cook Everything Fast. Recipes promise to stay within the 15- to 45-minute range, a supremely tempting asset for the weeknight gourmet. MS
Powell's City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 7:30 pm, FREE

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 16

COMEDY FEST—The lineup for this year's All Jane No Dick comedy festival looks badass. It's filled with more than 30 funny women—including the great Sara Schaefer, Aparna Nancherla, Phoebe Robinson, and Beth Stelling—who'll be doing stand-up and improv shows for five straight days of hilarity. It's a lady laff-fest—don't miss it! CF
Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE MLK, Thurs 7:30 pm & 9:30 pm, $20-25, see alljanenodick.com for complete Wed-Sun schedule

MUSIC—If you're a music-loving lady who's ever been catcalled while on a booze or candy run, Tacocat's NVM is the aural equivalent of packing a bedazzled can of pepper spray designed by Lisa Frank: necessary, lethal to creeps, and really fucking fun. Their show tonight promises to be all of these things. And there will probably be candy! MB
w/Thomas Mudrick, the Handles; Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water, 9:30 pm, $10

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 17

MUSIC—Still one of Portland's best, Blitzen Trapper is trying something new with two shows tonight at the Doug Fir, where they'll be playing Neil Young's Harvest in its entirety. Normally this is where I'd say something about how great this will be, but since I already noted that Blitzen Trapper is playing Harvest tonight, I assume you've already stopped reading this and are buying tickets and/or getting in line. EH
w/Hand of the Hills; Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 5 pm (all ages) & 9 pm (21+), $25

COMEDY—For a while there, Dave Attell was the alcoholic's Rick Steves, having had the genius to parlay long nights of drinking after his comedy sets into a cable show (Insomniac with Dave Attell), which was largely about drinking after his comedy sets. He's had a bunch of other shows since, but Attell's at his best where he began: on a stage, saying hilarious and offensive sentences. DVH
Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th, Fri-Sat 7:30 pm & 10 pm, $30

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 18

MUSIC—Have you heard Sinkane's new album Mean Love? It's soooooo good. The Sudan-born musician (AKA Ahmed Gallab) has really come into his sexy, falsetto-ed own with a collection of eclectic, groove-flecked, and slightly mournful pop songs. They're chockfull of '70s funk, soul, and Afropop, so this oughta be a feet-mover of a show. CF
w/Helado Negro, Grapefruit; Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi, 9 pm, $15

GAMES & CAFFEINE—The folks at the Portland Retro Gaming Expo have an admittedly loose definition of "classic" games: basically, any game not made for a manufacturer's current system. Which is great—because that means there's a joystick for anyone who wants one. And if your thumbs start to ache, it gets even better. The Oregon Convention Center's also hosting Coffee Fest this weekend. DCT
Oregon Convention Center, 777 NE MLK, see retrogamingexpo.com or coffeefest.com for schedules and admission prices

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 19

BOOKSGirls creator/showrunner/writer Lena Dunham sits down with Carrie Brownstein for a chat about her new memoir, Not That Kind of Girl, which recounts "<3ing New York," sex with tiny poets, and her curious fascination with non-neurotics. Tonight's Q&A is sold out, so if you got tickets in time, I hope you have fun and I'll try really hard not to be jealous. MB
Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 7:30 pm, $38-47.25, all ages

MUSIC—More than three decades into a prolific career, the Melvins won't stop rocking. King Buzzo and crew—including, these days, members of the Butthole Surfers—drop their latest, Hold It In, just five days before tonight's stop at the Roseland. Go see what metal's inexorable shape-shifters have in store this time around. DVH
w/Le Butcherettes; Roseland, 8 NW 6th, 8 pm, $16-26, all ages

MONDAY, OCTOBER 20

MUSIC—The sultry, succulent tunes of J Roddy Walston and the Business have their roots in the South, but the Baltimore outfit's rough-and-tumble, soulful rock is nationwide. With shards of glam, some Beatlesesque sunshine, and a jagged punk spirit, it's growly, howly, and loud—just the way you like it. NL
w/Fly Golden Eagle; Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 9 pm, $12

FILM—There are horrible things about Halloween—like children, for example, or those people who spell it "Hallowe'en"—but when it comes to theaters showing classic horror movies throughout October, you can't lose. This week's pick is The Fly, which takes over the Academy Theater with all of its goopy, bloody, oozing, Cronenbergian, Jeff Goldblumian greatness. Or horribleness, if you're squeamish. EH
Academy Theater, 7818 SE Stark, Movie Times, $4

TUESDAY, OCTOBER 21

MUSIC—Listening to Horse Feathers is like touring tiny islands of pop, which surface in oceans of beautiful instrumentation, each track a delicately constructed diorama of sound. Catching them live in a record store—on the day they drop new album So It Is with Us—is one of the best ways to experience their expansive-yet-private atmosphere. BR
Music Millennium, 3158 E Burnside, 7 pm, FREE, all ages

MUSIC—Portland's actually hosting two other aging rock legends tonight—Jimmy Buffett and Loudon Wainwright III—which seems like a weird cosmic coincidence. But you should probably see Bob Dylan, if given the choice. Because Bob Dylan is 73 years old and might DIE AT ANY MINUTE. And if you don't see him, and if he dies before he comes back to Portland, you might be sad. DCT
Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay, 8 pm, $58.50-136, all ages