BOOKS—Murderers! Wobblies! Vice Czars! And only one Dottie Do-Good. These are just some of the (real life!) shady characters you'll meet in JD Chandler and JB Fisher's look into Portland's checkered past, Portland on the Take. Chandler would know: He's spent years investigating murder and violent crime in the Pacific Northwest. MB
Powell's City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 7:30 pm, FREE

MUSIC—Vancouver BC's White Lung aren't just explosive—their two-minute calls-to-arms are actual, detonated explosions, with hardcore beats, heavier-than-metal riffs, and singer Mish Way's no-bullshit lyrics. It's everything you want punk rock to be: angry, sharp, smart, loud, and fast as hell. NL
w/Mormon Crosses; Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 9 pm, $10-12


FILM—The Hollywood Theatre's latest series invites Portland's best film critics to take over the theater and show under-seen classics. First up to the plate: Our own Erik Henriksen, who chose wisely, selecting Guillermo del Toro's immensely creepy debut film, Cronos, about a greedy old man, a magic bug, and lots and lots of death. BR
Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $8

TALK SHOW—Hosts/comedians Alex Falcone and Bri Pruett have cooked up an especially artsy outing of their excellent live talk show, Late Night Action. They're doing it in the artsy confines of the Portland Art Museum with artsy guests such as artist Wendy Red Star, photog Holly Andres, essayist Courtenay Hameister, and comedy galore! Prepare to be culturally edified and wickedly entertained! WSH
Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park, 8 pm, $10


MUSIC—Whoever thought this up is a genius: Take your favorite, most approachable cello ensemble (the Portland Cello Project, obvs) and combine them with the rectified, electric soul of Ural Thomas and the Pain, and there you have it—your new favorite thing. All that's missing is a bow on top. MS
Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie, Fri & Sat 8 pm, $17-20, all ages

FILM—"The timeless beauty of Catherine Deneuve, the cruel elegance of David Bowie, the open sensuality of Susan Sarandon combine to create a modern classic of perverse fear," says the trailer for Tony Scott's incredibly strange and awesome 1983 film The Hunger, a wondrous gothy thing. On 35mm, even! CF
Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 9:30 pm, $8


MUSIC—Here's an easy choice to make when looking for something fun to do on a Saturday night. Go see Portland's fave Prince cover band Erotic City, who never fail to get the "dearly beloveds" in the crowd shakin' and sweatin'. Plus they're joined by the Cars cover band Candy O, and Precious, a musical tribute to the Pretenders. They're the next best things to being there! WSH
Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, 9 pm, $12-15, all ages

PARTY—Get that holiday season rolling right with the semi-formal Sugar Town Sno-Ball! Held at maybe the best party-bar in town, get down to soul, blues, and R&B from the '50s-'70s with DJ Action Slacks and special guest DJ Larsupreme at this queer soul dance party to end all others. MS
The Spare Room, 4830 NE 42nd, 9 pm, $5


MUSIC—Despite their generic-seeming name, the Barr Brothers are anything but. Embracing Delta blues, African rhythms, and every speck on the map in between, the Montreal-based group's daring, devilish spin on global folk makes for one of the most hair-raising live shows around. Did I mention they have a fucking harpist? NL
w/Leif Vollebekk; Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 9 pm, $12-15

BOOKS—I don't even know why the rest of us bother to write anything so long as Mallory Ortberg is around. The founder of the fantastic site the Toast and one of the smartest and funniest people online, Ortberg's hilarious new book, Texts from Jane Eyre, imagines text messages between beloved literary figures, from King Lear to Cormac McCarthy. Tonight's reading is going to be great. EH
Powell's City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 7:30 pm, FREE


JOHN WATERS!—If there's one thing John Waters knows, it's the trashy delights that can be wrung from Christmastime. The cult filmmaker and author's delightfully charming one-man show A John Waters Christmas is a hysterical must-see, as Waters is one of the most erudite, elegant, and funny people alive, a true Prince of Puke among men. CF
Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie, 8 pm, $36-105

FILM—Watching Monty Python's Life of Brian on something other than your grandparents' Betamax is a reasonable holiday activity. It's one of the better Python films—not the one where the compulsive eater's stomach explodes, but the one about the fellow (Brian!) born one manger stall down from Jesus Christ and doomed to a life of mistaken identity. Happy birthday Brian! Also Jesus! DCT
Academy Theater, 7818 SE Stark, see Movie Times, $3-4


TRIVIA—For the past four years, local podcasters Bobby Roberts and Cort Webber have been hosting the super popular Geek Trivia—handing out thousands of dollars of prizes and comic book-related swag to those who know the difference between Boba Fett and Bib Fortuna. Tonight is the final Geek Trivia ever... so grab some friends, order some beers, and give winning this thing one last shot. EH
Kennedy School, 5736 NE 33rd, 7 pm, FREE

MUSIC—It's not actually spelled out anywhere, but Billy Idol's website STRONGLY suggests the 58-year-old still performs shirtless—at least on occasion. Sure, tonight's show is putatively sold out, but do you really want to risk missing all that glistening, screaming flesh just because dealing with scalpers is a bummer? No one ever said the cradle of love rocked easy, people. DVH
w/Guster, Spanish Gold; Roseland, 8 NW 6th, 7 pm, $37.50-55