MUSIC—You may or may not know Nicholas Gordon personally, but what happened to him—getting mugged and attacked with a hammer, leaving him with months of speech therapy to look forward to—could happen to anyone. A stellar lineup (including the Shivas, Us Lights, and Hustle and Drone) is lending a hand to raise money for him. Won't you? MARJORIE SKINNER
w/Talkative, Laura Palmer's Death Parade; Rontoms, 600 E Burnside, 8 pm, $5-10

COMICS—From his must-read analysis of comics as an art form, Understanding Comics, to his own adventure saga Zot!, Scott McCloud is one of the smartest, sharpest guys in comics. Tonight, he's in town with his acclaimed new graphic novel, The Sculptor—and he'll be in conversation with Daniel H. Wilson, author of Robopocalypse and DC Comics' Earth 2. ERIK HENRIKSEN
Powell's Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills, Beaverton, 7 pm, FREE


MUSIC—Revolution Hall, the new venue in what was once Washington High School's decrepit auditorium, is calling this its "preview weekend" before it officially roars to life this spring. It's a goddamned beautiful sign of things to come. Dream-folk wizards Alialujah Choir are celebrating their new album with co-headliners Wild Ones, followed by Dan Savage on Friday and Live Wire!'s season opener on Saturday. DENIS C. THERIAULT
Revolution Hall, 1300 SE Stark, 8 pm, $15, all ages

TALKING—TED Talks are so sloppy. The Japanese, in painstakingly structured fashion, have come up with a better way to get information from complete strangers. In PechaKucha, speakers offer up 20 slides, at 20 seconds apiece, for 400 seconds of potential genius or floundering failure. Tonight at Holocene, catch invited speakers' ruminations on "Design for Survival." DIRK VANDERHART
Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison, 7 pm, FREE, RSVP at


FILM—Thanks to an overwhelming number of films, it's easy to strike out at the Portland International Film Festival. To even your odds, pick the fest's more interesting titles, like the two tonight: What We Do in the Shadows is a Kiwi vampire comedy from the guys behind Flight of the Conchords, while the Japanese R100 follows a man who signs up with an S&M service—one that S&Ms him at random times. ERIK HENRIKSEN
What We Do in the Shadows at Cinema 21, 616 NW 21st, 8:45 pm, $12; R100 at the Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 10:30 pm, $12

COMEDY—It would not surprise me in the least to learn that comedian Kyle Kinane was a tough-talking sea captain in a past life. Marvel at his smart and salty tales of drunken shenanigans, falling down repeatedly, and making more than one bad life decision. He's an utterly hysterical bearded weirdo who'll make you snort beer out your nose. COURTNEY FERGUSON
w/Amy Miller; Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $18


MUSIC—Perhaps you're the type of person who can't express the love you're feeling. If so, today's the day to let the expert step in and do it for you, when the Oregon Symphony presents Valentine's Day with Smokey Robinson. Listen to this classic soul singer croon his greatest hits ("You've Really Got a Hold on Me," "The Tracks of My Tears," and more), then turn to your sweetie, and tell him/her, "What he said." WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY
Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 7:30 pm, $45-125, all ages

DRAG LUV—A night of monumental fun and creativity, the annual Love Ball is a glorious queer fête designed for those who don't do anything halfway. Celebrating everything camp, the Love Ball forgoes classic formal wear for "Porno Cliche," "Wintour Is Cumming"—anything that celebrates the loveable queerness in you. Plus it's a fund-raiser for local LGBTQ foundations. Gotta love that! WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY
The Embers Avenue, 110 NW Broadway, 9 pm, $10

COMEDY—In a town lousy with quality stand-up showcases, the feminist-friendly, warmhearted Am I Right, Ladies? is one of the best. Tonight, JoAnn Schinderle, Whitney Streed, the Doubleclicks (!), and more will join hosts Barbara Holm and Jen Tam in what promises to be a quick-witted middle finger to the paternalistic racket that is Valentine's Day. MEGAN BURBANK
Ford Food and Drink, 2505 SE 11th, 8 pm, $5, all ages



MOTORCYCLES—A pesky little snowstorm coincided with last year's annual the One Show, See See Motorcycles' huge, weekend-long showcase of custom bikes, art, and bands. If that kept you away, the clear skies of 2015 provide no such excuse. MARJORIE SKINNER
w/Danava, 1776, Erotic City, and more; 831 SE Salmon, Fri 6 pm-1 am, Sat 11 am-midnight, Sun 11 am-3 pm, FREE,

TRUCKS—Sometimes, one yearns for sophisticated, soul-stirring entertainment that enriches and enlightens your very being... and sometimes YOU JUST WANNA POUND PISSWATER AN' HOLLER "WHOOO, GODDAMN" AT THE MONSTER JAM WATCHIN' BIG-ASS TRUCKS GET BUCK-FUCKIN-WILD SHOOTIN' FIRE AND DOIN SWEET JUMPS. SHIT YEAH. BOBBY ROBERTS
Moda Center, 1 Center Court, Sat 2 & 7:30 pm, Sun 2 pm, $16-56, all ages

MUSIC—Portland's warhorses of soulful punk 'n' roll, Divers, are finally releasing their long-awaited first album. And Hello Hello is everything we could've asked for and more, with gloriously disheveled rock anthems and the fiery spark of Divers' live show—which you'll see for yourself tonight at the release show, which also functions as a benefit for harm reduction in Portland. NED LANNAMANN
w/Pageripper, Marriage + Cancer, Thin Coat; High Water Mark, 6800 NE MLK, 8 pm, $5 (or winter coat, sleeping bag, blanket)


COMEDY—Remember when people heard "Bill Cosby" and thought of Jell-O and sweaters? And now they think "probable rapist"? That was Hannibal Buress, the unbelievably gifted comedian who in October finally drove home how terrible that whole situation is while slaying an audience in Philly. Buress' entire act is like that. He'll make you physically hurt from laughter while saying shit you need to hear. DIRK VANDERHART
Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie, Mon 7 pm & 10pm, Tues 7 & 10 pm, $22-25

MUSIC—Jessica Lea Mayfield shows off her singer/songwriter chops tonight, playing fuzzy, crunchy tunes off her newest album Make My Head Sing. You can bet the Ohio musician will be wailing on the guitar with a set filled with stripped-down rock, shimmering vocals, and slower showstoppers. COURTNEY FERGUSON
Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water, 10 pm, $12


MUSIC—You can't go wrong with either Sonny and the Sunsets—who've just dropped another charming, oddball collection of pop gems in Talent Night at the Ashram—or Colleen Green, whose new album, I Want to Grow Up, upholds her tradition of nasty-but-nice, bong-friendly dream-punk. Luckily, tonight they're both playing in the same room, so no need to multitask. NED LANNAMANN
w/Larry Yes; Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 9 pm, $12

CATS!!!—Portland's first cat café is FINALLY HERE! When you order tea for two (and TWO for TEA!) at Purringtons Cat Lounge, one of the two will be AN ACTUAL CAT! Best of all, every PCL cat is adoptable! (House rules: YOUR cats can't come, and if you find a new buddy, don't just slip 'em out in your tote bag—ask. CATNAPPING IS A CRIME.) MEGAN BURBANK

Purrington's Cat Lounge, 3529 SE MLK, open Tues-Sun noon-8 pm, $8, for reservations