Two poster shows open tonight: The Goodfoot's annual Art of Musical Maintenance features work from some of the medium's best designers, while Floating World kicks off their "Fake Rock Band Poster Exhibit," in which over a dozen artists have designed posters and flyers for bands that don't actually exist. AH

The Goodfoot, 2845 SE Stark, 5 pm-2:30 am, through Jan 26; Floating World Comics, 20 NW 5th, Ste. 101, 6-10 pm, through Dec 31

Looking back, maybe it's unsurprising that John Doe would go from the raucously melodic punk of X to spending this decade making sweet, sincere country music. What is surprising is how damn easy he made the transition look. Richmond Fontaine's Willy Vlautin opens the show. DB

Dante's, 1 SW 3rd, 9 pm, $13-15


Hilarious curators/hosts Nick Prueher and Joe Pickett show off their amazing, constantly growing collection of bizarre, effed-up, and pants-pissingly funny VHS relics at the Found Footage Festival. These things defy description—expect to see the most painfully inept video-dating clips ever, an animated Chuck Norris, stupid cats, Klingons, and, naturally, people acting like total jackasses. It's incredibly awkward and incredibly awesome. EH

Laurelhurst Theater, 2735 E Burnside, Fri-Sat, 7 & 9:30 pm, $9, 21+

Don your ugliest sweater and head to the Aladdin Theater for the Portland Cello Project's holiday show spectacular. Join the local maestros, fresh off the road from a tour with Thao with the Get Down Stay Down, as they feature new scores and collaborations with the Portland Ukulele Project, the Robinsons, Panther, and Leviethan. Projected outcome: mind-blowing. RN

Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie, 8 pm, $13-15, all ages

This month's Midnight Movie, hosted by beloved, hee-larious podcasters Cort and Fatboy is none other than the Tim Burton/Henry Selick joint The Nightmare Before Christmas! What's more, Nightmare will be preceded by Burton's rarely seen 1984 short film Frankenweenie! And there'll be beer! EH

Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne, 10 pm, $3, 21+


Having jumped up to the big leagues, Blind Pilot is closing out 2009 with a pair of hometown shows. We're excited to see what next year brings for our very own indie-folk-pop ensemble. Cheer enough tonight and maybe we'll get some new material! PAC

w/Laura Veirs & the Hall of Flames (Fri & Sat), Mimicking Birds (Fri), Point Juncture, WA (Sat); Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, Fri (all ages) & Sat (21+), 8 pm, $13-15

Gross bike fact of the day: You're not supposed to wear underwear beneath Spandex bike shorts. All those tight-pantsed commuters? You're way closer to their junk than you thought. Ban the Spandex this holiday season and bring on the wool! The fifth annual BikeCraft features locally made bike accessories like cute bags from Queen Bee and Shaun Deller's perfect hats. SM

Sandbox Studio, 420 NE 9th, 10 am-5 pm


The Long Winters frontman John Roderick moonlights as a writer: His first book, out from Portland's Publication Studios, is a narrative written in 140-character increments (yes, in tweet form). He'll be performing and reading from the book tonight—and as an added bonus, the infamous Michael Hebb (founder of clarklewis) returns to Portland to prepare a meal before the reading. AH

Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi, 8 pm, reading $12, dinner $30

Get your fix of some warm winter ales, sheltered from the weather beneath the big Holiday Ale Fest tent. Drunkenness: It's one of the few surefire ways to soothe the pain of all that shopping insanity. PAC

Pioneer Courthouse Square, SW 6th & Morrison, Thurs-Sat 11 am-10 pm, Sun 11 am-7 pm, FREE admission, $20 tasting package


You know how when you rub a dog in just the right place, its leg goes all twitchy? Passion Pit is like rubbing that spot on your brain; their ridiculously joyful synth-pop melodies and helium-sucking vocals get you all squirmy and jumpy, you won't be able to control yourself. NL

Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside, 8 pm, $17.50-20, all ages

Interesting fact: Within each Joe Purdy song are coded instructions on keeping a beard as full and luxurious as his. It's an industry secret that his latest mumbly, acoustic album, Last Clock on the Wall, is really an ode to beard maintenance and hygiene. Go tonight—you might learn something. DB

w/Meaghan Smith; Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi, 8 pm, $15


The Metric System (SI) is boring and confusing. Luckily, the band Metric isn't—rather, they're exciting, straightforward, rock-your-socks-off indie pop. Be prepared to expel megalitres of perspiration and dance around 1,000 kilograms' worth (yep, that's a metric ton).

Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside, 8 pm, $17.50-20, all ages

It's Planned Parenthood's Sexy Tuesday! No, we're not making it up. Everyone knows the hottest people support Planned Parenthood, so here's your chance to meet some like-minded hot folks who're there to mix and mingle. MD

New Deal Distillery, 1311 SE 9th, 6-8:30 pm, FREE


If you're like me, American commercials make you want to cut your face off and stomp on it. However, the Brits exhibit far more creativity in this realm, as evidenced by the 2009 British Advertising Awards, featuring the year's most hilarious (and sexy) commercials as well as PSAs designed to make you say, "Cor blimey, guv! That's massive!" WSH

Northwest Film Center's Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park, 7 pm, $8

Alex Ebert was the frontman for LA dance-punk band Ima Robot, but he turned on, dropped out, and become Edward Sharpe, the barefoot figurehead of cult/commune/roots-rock band the Magnetic Zeros. Whatever you make of the hippie transformation, there's no question that their fiery, soulful live shows are attracting a lot of attention. NL

w/Fool's Gold, Local Natives; Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 9 pm, $12-14