A THING CALLED LOVE—"Hilarity" may not be the first adjective you associate with glam rock, but England's the Darkness does it right. Best known for their barn-burning falsetto hit "I Believe in a Thing Called Love," the Darkness rocks the fuck out with expert precision, while having tons of squealy fun. WSH
Roseland, 8 NW 6th, 8 pm, $23, all ages

WHATTA DRAG!—Ladies, start your engines! The always hilarious-amazing-salacious Portland Drag Race is back for its fourth season at Red Cap Garage. Strap on your heels and snag prizes in categories like "Lip Sync for Your Life Challenge" or just sit at the bar and let the spectacle unfold before your eyes. SM
Red Cap Garage, 1035 SW Stark, 9 pm, FREE


REAL COUNTRY—I don't care if you don't like country music: the Caleb Klauder Country Band is the best live band in Portland. When this crack team of ace players lets 'er rip, the dance floor explodes in a hullabaloo of twangin', twistin', good old-fashioned American music. Don't miss the expert yodeling of opening band Petunia and the Vipers. NL
The Spare Room, 4830 NE 42nd, 9 pm, $10

DOUBLE DARK—The Portland International Film Festival is wrapping up this week, and tonight offers a final stab at dabbling in the darker end of the PIFF pool. Snowtown is a masterful and deeply unsettling dramatization of real-life serial murders in Australia, and Great Britain's Kill List—a horror thriller about two hired killers—screens at PIFF After Dark. Sleep well! MS
Snowtown, Lloyd Mall 8, 2320 Lloyd Center Mall, 6:30 pm, $10; Kill List, Cinema 21, 616 NW 21st, 11:30 pm, $10


HECKLEVISION!—Last time we did Hecklevision—when we showed Red Dawn, and people sent texts that popped up onscreen?—it was AMAZING. This time's going to be even better. Because we're showing Schwarzenegger's Commando. There will also be beer. And—to honor costar Alyssa Milano—milano cookies. We shall call them Alyssa Milano milanos. EH
Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $7

PONY PARTY—Every five-year-old's birthday party should have pony rides. Well, at dance night Blow Pony's five-year party your inner pony will be dancing all night long to a whole corral of DJs and live bands like Leslie & the Lys and Pennyhawk. This is going to be an unbridled blast. CF
Rotture, 315 SE 3rd, 9 pm, $8-10

PANCELLO—There is only one band in Portland who could adequately pay tribute to the 20th anniversary of Pantera's Vulgar Display of Power, and that band is... the Portland Cello Project. Known for executing unexpected genres, PCP might deliver the only Pantera concert that doesn't threaten a case of tinnitus. MS
Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, 9 pm, $10-12


FREE OSCAR(S)—Fleur de Lethal Cinematheque's Oscar Party at the Hollywood Theatre promises a glamorous viewing party complete with costumes, contests, and comedian Ian Karmel. Another entertaining option: Watch along with Blogtown's Joneser (AKA Elinor Jones) as she hilariously blogs her thoughts and reactions LIVE for the duration of the awards. CG
Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 3 pm, FREE ($25 for VIP); live blog at

YOU WHO!—Why should the 21+ set get all the good shows? What about the very, very underage crowd? Today the Shins take a break from the grown-up world to play a set for toddlers at the Kennedy School's lovely You Who! kid's rock show series. It's super sold out, but maybe you'll get lucky. SM
Kennedy School, 5736 NE 33rd, 1 pm, $5-10, non-walkers FREE


COLLEGEMiddlesex and The Virgin Suicides author Jeffrey Eugenides' great new novel The Marriage Plot is a love story that unfolds on a college campus, so what better place to hear him discuss it than at U of P, as part of their Distinguished Writers Series? AH
University of Portland, Buckley Center Auditorium, 5000 N Willamette, 7:30 pm, FREE

CAN YOU SMELLLLL—There is a difference between Dwayne Johnson, the guy who rides CGI bees in kids' movies, and The Rock. The Rock is a fabulous cook who specializes in roasted jabroni and candied rootie-poot. He will likely be our president one day, and on that day? America will have achieved all it was meant to. BR
WWE Raw, Rose Garden, 1 Center Court, 5:30 pm, $20-75


FORSTER SAVES—Starring the always-underrated Robert Forster (Jackie Brown, Medium Cool), 1983's Vigilante costars Fred Williamson, is directed by William Lustig (Maniac Cop), and tells a violent tale of urban revenge. Some people say Jesus saves. I say Forster saves. EH
Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $7

RED ROTHKO—Portland's connection to the Oregon-raised artist Mark Rothko busts wide open this month, with a retrospective at the Portland Art Museum coinciding with Portland Center Stage's production of the Tony Award-winning Red, which explores Rothko's work in the 1950s. AH
Portland Art Museum, 1219 SW Park, Tues-Sun, through May 27; Red at Portland Center Stage, Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th, Tues-Sun 7:30 pm, Sat-Sun 2 pm, through March 18,


BROOD 'N' PACK—If you caught Toronto's Elliott Brood at Pickathon, you already know they're a terrific folk-roots band with a damn fine live show. And with Vancouver, BC's garage chuggers the Pack A.D. opening, this night's gonna fall on the good side of rowdy. NL
Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 9 pm, $10-12

CARE, DAMN YOU! CARE!—The Mercury and the Bus Project are revivifying their mostly monthly Give a Shit Club—a laidback forum where you can do a little bit of drinking and a whole lot of talking about local and national issues. Today's theme is all about volunteering, and how and where you can do it. DCT
Union/Pine, 525 SE Pine, 6 pm, FREE, all ages