LET'S GO CRAZY—Dearly beloved, we are gathered here tonight to get through this thing called Pussy Control. DJs Black Dog and Nathan Detroit distill the essence of Prince and his Minneapolis sound into one sweaty, lovesexy night of madness. BR
Yes and No, 20 NW 3rd, 10 pm, FREE

PUPPET STRINGS—World-class contemporary dance meets puppetry in the newest offering from White Bird Uncaged: Innovative choreographer Crystal Pite's Dark Matters pits puppet against puppeteer, in a dance-fable about creation and destruction. AH
Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, Thurs March 15-Sat March 17, 8 pm, $30,


WE WANT THE FUNK—James Brown may be the Godfather of Soul, but George Clinton is that crazy bastard from outer space who, with Parliament Funkadelic, has been seeding the Earth with four decades' worth of filthy, stank-ass, gloryhallastoopid funk. BR
Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside, 9 pm, $25-27, 21+

FISTICUFFS—What better way to celebrate St. Paddy's than to watch Oregon beat the shillelagh out of Ireland? It's the Oregon vs. Ireland Amateur Boxing Smoker, featuring the heavy fists of the West Portland Boxing Club pounding the Holy Family Boxing Club of Ireland. You're going down, Danny boy! WSH
Kells, 112 SW 2nd, 7:30 pm, $25, 21+


CRASH SMASH BASH—The roller derby ladies of the Rose City Rollers' High Rollers are playing to protect their league lead against the hungry-for-a-win vixens of the Heartless Heathers. There's sure to be plenty of hard hits, spills, and slam-bang derby in this game. CF
The Hangar at Oaks Park, 7805 SE Oaks Park, 6 pm, $14-20, live stream on the day of the event

ST. PAT'S RAP—Forget the luck of the Irish; the long-awaited return of local hiphop collective Sandpeople is the real reason to celebrate tonight. PLUS an emcee battle like you've never seen, and the whole thing's hosted by none other than Andy Milonakis. Now who's feeling lucky? NL
Branx, 320 SE 2nd, 8:30 pm, $10-13, all ages


REFN—Today's the day to take advantage of the NW Film Center's Nicolas Winding Refn film series, with the exhilarating Bronson—about Britain's infamously violent prisoner Charlie Bronson—and Drive, a near-perfect film about Ryan Gosling driving around looking handsome and beating up bad guys. EH
NW Film Center's Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park, Bronson at 5 pm, Drive at 7 pm, $9 a film

FARE THEE WELL, ZOMBIE—It's the season finale of The Walking Dead, which means there's gonna be chaos down on the farm, the survivors questioning Rick's leadership ability... and what else? OH, YEAH. Brain eating, abject terror, and zombie decapitations. As apocalypses go, this one ain't half bad. WSH
Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 9 pm, FREE, 21+


RED FLAG—The Republican presidential debate is tainting our very own Oregon Public Broadcasting studio. Ray Suarez of PBS NewsHour and Ralph Hallow of the Washington Times will moderate the debate, the last one of the primary season. Tune in to catch the completely sane, relevant, and comforting discussion. AZ
Broadcast on NPR and OPB, 6 pm

CHEAP THRILLS—Oh, boo hoo hoo, you've spent all your money over the weekend, proving Loverboy right—again. Cheer up, spendy! The Doug Fir is offering a totally free, three-band show tonight, including sunshiny party poppers Béisbol, plus Morning Parade and Adventure Galley, so you can leave the moneybags at home. NL
Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 9 pm, FREE


SUPERFUZZ BIGMUFF—Grunge may have come and gone, but Mudhoney keeps going. And that's because certain things—namely, thunderously loud guitars—never go out of style. Don't miss the chance to have one of the all-time great Pacific Northwest rock 'n' roll bands steamroll your ears into submission. NL
w/feedtime; Star Theater, 13 NW 6th, 9 pm, $15-18

TRANSIT TALES—Kick Ass Oregon History pairs up with the TriMet Diaries to host Humanity on Wheels, a night of bus-riding delights and horrors. Historians will share transit tales of old, while others will tell modern TriMet adventures. Stick around for an open mic, where you can share humorous experiences of your own! AZ
Jack London Bar, 529 SW 4th, 7:30 pm, FREE


MAGNETIC 69—The creative mind of Stephin Merritt comes to town with his sometimes-synth, sometimes "no-synth" project the Magnetic Fields on the heels of their new (synthy) Love at the Bottom of the Sea. So grab someone you love and point your toes toward the dance floor. MS
w/Holcombe Waller; Roseland, 8 NW 6th, 8 pm, $30, all ages

KRONOS—Known for playing pieces both melodic and dissonant, the Kronos Quartet will once again challenge our ideas about chamber and string music. The concert, hosted by Reed College, will include New York composer Steve Reich's memorial to September 11, 2001, "WTC 9/11." NG
Reed College's Kaul Auditorium, 3203 SE Woodstock, 7:30 pm, $27-45