10-GALLON LAFFS—If you love great sketch comedy, check out one of the rib-ticklingest groups out of Austin, Texas: Stag Comedy. Blending weird live sketches with the occasional gut-busting video, they're the best thing to come out of Texas since... okay, since I can't think of anything, let's just say they're the best thing to come out of Texas. WSH
Boom Bap, 640 SE Stark, Thurs 9 pm, $5, all ages; Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne, Fri 8 pm, $5, 21+

ELVIS' BIRTHDAY—Fuck Graceland! We've got Downtown Elvis, whose 50th birthday party is free tonight. The old-school Portland weirdo spent 10 of his years playing a tiny guitar in a black pantsuit at Saturday Market, in between operating a spanking booth and starring in a wrestling league. SM
w/Advisory, Pillowfight, & more; Star Theater, 13 NW 6th, 7 pm, FREE, 21+


INDIAN BURIAL GROUND—Clear your calendar for an onslaught of Halloween films showing this month around town. Kick it off right with local podcasters cortandfatboy's screening of 1982's funny, scary, smart Poltergeist, with its suburbia populated with ominous trees, badass tequila worms (wait, I guess that was in the second one), and mischievous interior-decorating spirits. You might've forgotten how awesome this flick is. CF
Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne, 11 pm, $3, 21+

BEST BUSKERS EVER—Here's a hilarious idea come to life: Pack the slowpoke Portland Streetcar with 16 local bands. Viola! A $1, all-ages, hop-on, hop-off roving music festival! Who cares if it takes 20 minutes to go 10 blocks? You've got Sun Angle, Jeffrey Jerusalem, and over a dozen others to keep you entertained during the second annual Streetcar Mobile Music Fest. SM
All streetcars on Eastside Loop, 6-10 pm, $1, all ages; afterparty at Union/Pine, 525 SE Pine, 9 pm-midnight, FREE, all ages

CODY RIVERS—Sketch comedy isn't quite the cultural force it once was—the kids are all about stand-up these days—but that's no excuse for missing brilliant sketch duo the Cody Rivers show. These Washingtonians are cerebral, inventive, and quite simply two of the funniest people you'll see in any comedic form. AH
Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE MLK, Fri-Sat 9:30 pm, $10-12


TEXTUAL—Portland's favorite literary dress-up party is back! The seventh annual Text Ball, "The Graphic Details," is hosted by AC Dickson with storytelling by Nicole Georges, Carson Ellis, and Matt Bors, plus music, word games, and even dirty limericks! Incorporating text into your ensemble is strongly encouraged. MS
Disjecta, 8371 N Interstate, 7 pm, $12-15

HEART OF DARKNESS—Travel deep into the jungles of heavy metal for the fifth annual Fall into Darkness Festival. This three-day blitzkrieg of head-banging promises bone-rattling fun, and Saturday's lineup at Branx is stellar, with old guard of doom metal Saint Vitus and sludgy North Carolina outfit Weedeater, whose frontman lost a toe after horsing around with his favorite shotgun! CF
w/Sourvein, Ephemeros; Branx, 320 SE 2nd, 9 pm, $12, 21+

SHIT-SUCKING VAMPIRE—The '80s vampire classic The Lost Boys gets reprised for the stage by the same hilarious crew that brought you Road House: The Play! Get ready for giant hair, leather jackets, vampires on roller skates, and some of the funniest actors in town. AH
Ethos at IFCC, 5340 N Interstate, Fri-Sat 8 pm, through Nov 3, $18-22,


HOPE/CHANGE—Third Rail is one of Portland's best theater companies, so it's worth noticing when they get ambitious: That Hopey Changey Thing is the first play in a four-play cycle that takes an intimate look at how contemporary political events have affected one modern family. They're producing one play in the cycle a year for the next four years, so get on board now. AH
Winningstad Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, Thurs-Sat 7:30 pm, Sun 2 pm, through Oct 28, $22-42,

GIVE ME THE BAT, WENDY—All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work The Shining (in 35mm) and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes... BR
Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, Fri-Thurs, see Movie Times, $7-8


A-MAIZE-ING!—Halloween's, like, weeks away. But it's definitely not too early to nerd out inside one of Sauvie Island's very elaborate corn mazes—then take a hayride, buy a pumpkin, or eat and drink yourself into a stupor. If you're feeling apocalyptic, dig Kruger's Farm's Mayan-inspired labyrinth. Or head down the road to the Pumpkin Patch and wander through a likeness of Portlandia. (The statue.) DCT
Kruger's Farm, 17100 NW Sauvie Island, maze open daily, $6; Pumpkin Patch, 16511 NW Gillihan, maze open daily, $7

PUTRIFIERS—John Dwyer, frontman for Bay Area garage-rock band Thee Oh Sees, recently counted Extreme Elvis, Sun Ra, Donald Duck, and Van Halen as key influences in his musical upbringing. You'd have to be crazy not to want see how that manifests itself onstage. BR
w/Sic Alps; Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, Mon 5:30 pm, $13, all ages; Tues 9 pm, $13, 21+


FINDERS KEEPERS—Absurd trash-archiving magazine Found celebrates its 10th birthday with a nationwide tour by its heartthrob founder Davy Rothbart and his even cuter brother Peter. Tonight, the pair shows off readers' best new finds, sing some weird songs, and read from a new book. It'll be every man's treasure. SM
Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison, 8:30 pm, $10

DESIGN WEEK—The first-ever Design Week Portland kicks off tonight, with five days full of lectures, workshops, exhibitions, films, and more, celebrating Portland's active creative community across many disciplines. Get ready to catch some science, do some networking, and have a ton of fun. Start with the opening party hosted by CreativeCares. MS
The Cleaners, 403 SW 10th, 7:30 pm, $10,


WORDS + MUSIC—The wholly excellent Tin House magazine is throwing an awesome shindig tonight titled Tin House: A Slice of the City featuring readings from local luminaries Jon Raymond and Pauls Toutonghi paired with great local bands Golden Retriever and Cloaks. All to celebrate the cultural exchange between PDX and Brooklyn. Thanks, Brooklyn! WSH
Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison, 8 pm, $5

YOLO DOLO—Every Wednesday in October, Dolorean plays free happy hour sets at the LaurelThirst, offering the perfect occasion to ease out of those workday blues and into a stiff drink. Led by songwriter extraordinaire Al James, the band's one of the best in town, alternating between fiery rock and the lonesomest folk you'll ever hear. NL
LaurelThirst Public House, 2958 NE Glisan, 6 pm, FREE