opening this week

Simon the Magus
Michael S. Kelly's one-man show about a software engineer who sets out to create a direct connection with God. Plenty of esoteric mysticism and magic for all! Coho Theatre, 2257 NW Raleigh, 220-2646, Fri-Sat 10:30 pm, Sun 7 pm, through June 21, $10-$12

one week only

All Jane No Dick
The women of All Jane No Dick, Stacey Hallal and Deanna Moffitt, are pretty funny. They don't over-perform either. Their improv is inherently fresh for the primary reason that you hardly ever see it. All Jane No Dick, at the Hollywood Theater, 4321 SE Hawthorne, 233-5798, Fri-Sat 10:30 pm, $10

Les Miserables
Some of the catchiest showtunes ever written wrapped up in a perfect little hokey can, like Kipper Snacks. You'll be humming Jean Valjean's theme song for days after this one, but the question is: is that really what you want out of life? Newmark Theater at PCPA, 1111 SW Broadway, 224-4400, Tues-Wed 7:30 pm, $26-$68.50

closing this week

Hair
It's clear from the opening number, "Aquarius" that despite a light and sound system from the stone ages, the cast of Radiant Theatre's production of this hippie extravaganza is ready to rock. They vamp, they strut, they grind, they hump, they remove clothing with reckless abandon (you won't see another show this year with more flopping male genitalia), and best of all, they sing with unrestrained gusto. JWS Radiant Theatre, at Artichoke Music, 2315 NE Alberta, 502-8261, Fri-Sat 8 pm, Sun 2 pm, through May 25, $14

Portland's Underground Showbiz Society, Y'All!
With acts like the Famous Mysterious Actor Players and Rachel Parenta, this event is bound to at least not be boring. Plus, its name spells a pretty nifty acronym. Obsidian Gallery, 420 SW Washington, 6th Floor, 249-3742, Sun 7 pm, through May 25, $3

Three Tall Women
Edward Albee's Pulitzer Prize-winning riff on an elderly woman looking back on her turbulent past. The Profile Theatre Project at Theater! Theatre!, 3430 SE Belmont, 242-0080, Thurs-Sat 8 pm, Sun 2 pm, through May 25, $12-$25

current runs

Frogz
Frogz is as fun and innovative as it ever was, though it could benefit from some fresh writing... A new work, "Rabbits," is possibly the best skit of the lot, featuring movement skill as sophisticated as any of the other acts, and a clever, witty story to bring it all to the next level. JWS Imago Theater, 17 SE 8th Ave, 231-9581, Wed-Sat 7:30 pm, Sat-Sun 1:30 pm, Sun 5:30 pm, through June 1, $14-$24

Memoir
The 25th-anniversary production of John Murrell's play about the 19th-century diva Sarah Bernhardt--no relation to Sandra. Coho Theatre, 2257 NW Raleigh, 220-2646, Thurs-Sat 8 pm, Sun 2 pm, through June 21, $18

Spirits of the Ordinary
An adaptation of Kathleen Alcala's novel, which explores a Jewish Mexican's quest for a gold mine that haunts his dreams. The Miracle Theater, 525 SE Stark Street, 236-7253, Thurs 7:30 pm, Fri-Sat 8 pm, Sun 2 pm, through May 31, $13

Touch
Touch draws on the classic rational scientist-in-irrational-love motif--and yet escapes the predictable clichés by wholeheartedly and convincingly devoting itself to the process the protagonist, Kyle, undergoes, from ecstatic love, to a grief that shuts out the world, to the cold comfort found in strangers. AS Artists Repertory Theatre, at the IFCC, 5340 N Interstate, 241-1278, Thurs, Sun 7 pm, Fri-Sat 8 pm, Sun 2 pm, through Jun 1, $22

dance/other

National Tap Dance Day
Pretty good prices for lots of fun. The Jefferson Dancers, Terry Brock and more will get their tap on in honor of this special day. Come at 7 pm for their performance; come at 5 pm for a quickie lesson, and be ready to participate in an open tap jam at 6. PICA, at the Tiffany Center, 1410 SW Morrison, 222-9853, Sun 5 pm, $7 for performance, plus $5 for class

extended

Three Plays, Five Lives
Three Plays throws down (and I do mean "throw") for one more weekend, with various special performances. Thursday is a benefit for PCAC, Friday is half-price, and Saturday will culminate with a cast/audience party, replete with food and drink. Liminal Space, 403 NW 5th, 890-2993, Thurs, Sat 8 pm, Fri 9 pm, $6-$12