Opening This Week

* Chekhov One-Act Plays
Chekhov doesn't get produced enough, we say, particularly his one-acts. Tonight, The Bear, The Evils of Tobacco, The Swan Song, and The Proposal, directed by Lewis & Clark's awesome assistant theater professor Stepan Simek, and fueled by the intoxicating, hit-and-miss glycerin of crazy college kids. Fir Acres Theatre, Lewis & Clark College, 0615 SW Palatine Hill Road, 768-7495, Opens Fri, runs Thurs-Sat 7:30 pm, through March 13, $8

* Sneaky Little Armageddons
The Fever Theater company presents its second Portland show, an ambitious collaborative effort of local writers, actors, designers, and choreographers. The resulting culmination tells the story of a painfully reclusive woman whose life spins out of control when she places an ad for roommates. Make reservations, as seating is limited. Fever Theater at the B & O Warehouse, 107 SE Washington, 233-4420, Opens Fri, runs Thurs-Sun 8 pm, through March 28, $10-15 sliding scale

One Week Only

* A Night of Rock
This is a music event, but it's in support of local live theater, so we at the Arts Rodeo will endorse it heartily. Tonight, Theatre Vertigo presents a rockin' party with Little Sue, Arroyo, Jasmine Ash, Hyperstar, and Andy Baldwin. Theatre Vertigo at the Fez, 316 SW 11th, 306-0870, 7 pm, $8

* Chicago
We're becoming bigger fans of Broadway in Portland every day. How else can you indulge yourself with the cheesiest, biggest, most overblown musicals in the world without flying to NYC? BIP brings 'em through, just for you. This month it's Chicago, about Roxie Hart, the tough, sexy... ah, fuck it, you know what it's about. If you didn't see the movie you were probably dead or something. Broadway in Portland, at Keller Auditorium, SW Third and Clay, 790-ARTS, March 9-13 @ 7:30 pm, March 13 @ 2 pm, March 14 @ 1 & 6:30 pm, $10-63

Current Runs

Kevin-Michael Moore is brilliantly bloody and bloody brilliant, and the rest of the cast lend life to Joe Orton's mothball-smelling murder mystery. Coho Theatre, 2257 NW Raleigh, 220-2646, Thurs-Sat 8 pm, Sun 2 pm, through Mar 20 (extended), $18-20


* The 3rd Floor's Dollar Days
The 3rd Floor offers its usual stellar lineup of hilarious performers doing sketch comedy, with two intriguing new additions: Deanna Wells (good all-around actor) and crazy radio personality Daria O'Neill (YOWZA!). Plus! Your ticket price includes a special rebate: "$1 Cash Given With Each Paid Admission at the Door"! Free money! The 3rd Floor, at the Miracle Theatre, 525 SE Stark, 258-1681, Fri-Sat 8 pm, through March 27, $11

Who's In Charge Here
Your friends and rad improvisers Brad Fortier and Nate Halloran presents another installment of their popular evening of funny fun. Tonight they promise "lakes of blood-soaked laughter." Fort Hal at the Hollywood Theater, 4122 NE Sandy, Sat 7:15 pm, $10

* House of Cunt
Wild Abandon = delicious food and cocktails in quiet, elegant atmosphere. House of Cunt = discomfortingly odd, frequently hilarious, hands-on sketch comedy. Wild Abandon + House of Cunt=??!!!?? House of Cunt at Wild Abandon, 2411 SE Belmont, 232-4458, Thurs 8:30 pm, Fri 10:30 pm, through March 5, $10