THURSDAY, APRIL 19

8:00 CW SMALLVILLE

Lynda "Wonder Woman" Carter guest stars as a meteor freak who just happens to be Chloe's mom!

9:00 NBC 30 ROCK

The unfortunately named Floyd asks Liz to move with him to the Midwest. SNORT! Right.

FRIDAY, APRIL 20

8:00 MYTV THE LIFE AQUATIC WITH STEVE ZISSOU—Movie

(2004) In this quirkified comedy from Wes Anderson, Bill Murray vows to kill the shark that ate his partner.

10:00 VH1 ACCEPTABLE TV

Be sure to check out this funny show where viewer sitcom pilots (like Homeless James Bond) are given a shot!

SATURDAY, APRIL 21

8:00 NBC HEROES MINI-MARATHON

Miss the last few episodes of Heroes? Get your nerd on and get caught up!

SUNDAY, APRIL 22

8:00 FOX THE SIMPSONS

Marge becomes obsessed with the dangerous world of online role-playing games!

9:00 TVLAND THE TV LAND AWARDS

The greatest shows on TV (past and present) are celebrated. There better be an award for Tom Selleck's mustache!

MONDAY, APRIL 23

9:00 NBC HEROES

Heroes returns from its break, and guess what? Creepy Eric Roberts still wants to kidnap Claire! He should get a hobby.

10:00 NBC REAL WEDDING CRASHERS

Debut! Pranksters infiltrate an actual wedding to ruin a couple's perfect day. NICE.

TUESDAY, APRIL 24

9:00 CW SEARCH FOR THE NEXT PUSSYCAT DOLL

The new "Pussycat Doll" is chosen and assimilated into the group. (In three months, look for her at a strip club near you.)

10:00 FX THE SHIELD

When Vic's job is on the line, Claudette rides to the rescue!

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 25

8:00 FOX AMERICAN IDOL

Celebrities Kelly Clarkson, Pink, Borat, Gwen Stefani, and more perform for charity. (By now, Sanjaya's a charity, right?)

8:00 CW AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL

It's never-before-seen footage of the girls getting loaded and scratching each other's eyes out. YAY!