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Please. THIS is the issue that alienates you from the Democratic party? What about all the thousands of other travesties they've committed?
How about we just assume that a commitment in and of itself is bullshit? A comittment is a commitment until it isn't. There shouldn't be any "promising." A promise doesn't make it reality, it only sets people up for an eventual letdown.
I'm sure some dweeb is going to chime in here with "I'm glad I'm not in a relationship with you." well yeah, good for me as well. I make no presumptions with regards to commitment in my relationships. I either commit or I don't.
And yes, I am glad I'm not in a relationship with you.
Fuck that... if you commit, then fucking well commit and be human enough to stick to what you say you'll do. You decide that he/she isn't who you want to fuck anymore... then dump em and fuck whoever you choose. But don't be a douche and lead someone along thinking you are being honest with them only to betray and fuck them over when you fuck someone else over.
Don't want to commit and play that game... then DON'T FUCKING COMMIT. Tell them that you are a free agent... they are free to screw you and others while you are free to screw you or anyone else they choose. People live the open relationship lifestyle and it works well for some, but not all.
We shouldn't have to assume that someones commitment to us is bullshit... If you say you are going to do something I fully expect it to be done until you tell me otherwise. Then I can decide if the new path is ok with me or not.
Uhmm, yeah, that is the point. Either the guy gets his foot fetish, or the relationship is over. It doesn't matter who exactly does the breaking up with who, the relationship is still over, and saying so isn't being manipulative, it is being honest. Now, the guy would be being manipulative if he threatened to break up with her over the foot fetish thing and was lying, but that isn't what Dan is suggesting. Of course, before the guy delivers that ultimatum to his girlfriend, he should decide if he wants to risk the relationship over his fetish, but if he does, then he should do so...
I think part of her problem may be that she views him kissing her feet as "dirty" or something, but that is an very easy thing to fix: He should wash them first. He'd probably enjoy that anyways, and I don't think I've ever met a woman that doesn't enjoy a foot massage. If what he really wants is dirty, smelly feet, that may be something he has to work up to, but at least he'll be going down that path as opposed to right now where he isn't.
Because people never change their minds.
Because people never change.
Because relationships never fade.
The idea that comitting to you NOW AND FOREVER is just brain-dead stupid. You have no fucking clue where your life will be in 20 years, and there is no guarantee you will love the person or WANT to commit to them. NOBODY does. NO marriage certificate will help with that (it will actually hurt, as it is legal entrapment.)
Commit when you want to commit, and stop committing and communicate that cessation when the time comes. SIMPLE.
It's the "or indulging my fetish in any other way" that is so suspicious.
Maybe he wants to give her sweaty feet a tongue bath then kiss her on the lips!
I think we are saying the same thing slightly differently... sure you can't know that in 20 years you will want to be with, or be married to the person you are with now. But IF you make a commitment, then you should stick to that commitment until you decide that commitment doesn't work anymore.
A commitment doesn't mean from now until forever... it means from now until we (or one of us) decides its over.
If you commit to putting your kid through college you should plan to do that... now if the brat starts calling you a pile of shit, telling you they hate you and don't need you... then I say you void that commitment and take the savings and go on a nice vacation. See what I mean... live up to what you say you will until that just doesn't make sense (and it shouldn't be on a whim). But have the decency to tell the person(s) involved that you aren't playing along anymore.