Savage Love Jan 5, 2012 at 4:00 am

Open the Swinging Door

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1
Thank you so much for this article! After a year and a half of absolute bliss with my boyfriend, we've recently decided to try out an open relationship. We love each other tremendously, we're best friends, and we plan on getting married. There's nothing wrong with our relationship and our sex life is great. "The whole open relationship thing" has been an ongoing conversation the entire time we've been dating and after a year and a half we decided we were in good, solid place where we could take that step. Bottom line, we're not trying to "fix" anything. We had a big long talk about boundaries and what we would both be comfortable with. All in all this has been a very positive, good thing for us. It makes me really happy to hear that other couples are out there, being sex-positive and open minded. I have to say that I've been shocked at our friend's reactions to this decision, mostly in a good way. I recently told a close friend about this that I had not planned on telling because I wasn't sure she'd understand. To my surprise, she reacted with fascination and then talked my ear off about a book she'd read about it and then wanted me to keep her posted on how it was working. A lot of our friends have initially thought that this is a step towards us breaking up or that this was a step backwards for us. However, after some explaining, most of our friends have said that it's great that we can put that amount of trust in each other and are amazed at how openly we are able to talk to each other about sex (and everything else). I feel very blessed to have such an open minded groups of friends. :) But more than anything I feel blessed to be in a relationship with a delightful man that I want to spend with rest of my life with where anything and everything is possible. So thank you for spreading the notion that it's okay for people to be in non-traditional relationships because it's what they want to do, and not because they are trying to "fix" something. I love my man-friend and I'm ecstatic that we can be this flexible and honest with each other. Yay us!

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