The Last Best Summer Ever
Remember back when you were eight and mom would hook you up with a cheap waterslide in the backyard? Well now that you’re (mostly) an adult, you can make one your own damn self! Alternately, you can take an even more practical route and split the cost of your DIY slip-n-slide with friends.
💧 A long sheet of plastic or tarp about 45 feet long, and ideally at least 6-feet wide. (Try Lowe’s or Home Depot.)
💧 A long hose with a spray-gun attachment
💧 A water source
💧 Cheap conditioning shampoo or body wash
💧 A squirt bottle
💧 Sand bags
💧 BONUS: an inflatable donut for more than one way to slide
💧 💧 BONUS BONUS: A cooler full of beer and/or cider
YOU'LL NEED TO:
Choose a grassy knoll! Ideally it’ll be in a friend’s yard (or a friend’s rich parent’s yard) with a gentle hill and a flat plain at the bottom.
Starting at the top of the hill, roll out the heavy-duty plastic sheet, giving yourself enough room for a running head-start. Make sure to also steer clear of pavement, and lay out enough plastic on the flat part to give sliders space to slow down. (You don’t want grassburn on your ass, do you?)
Weigh the top and bottom of the plastic down with sand bags, or other heavy objects that you won’t stub your toe on.
After making sure the hose is hooked up to the spigot, position the nozzle to hold a mist-spray at the top of the slide. It’s probably best to find a branch, chair, or clothing line to hang it from. If you want to get real fancy, go halvsies (or thirdsies) on an inflatable rainbow sprinkler from Pottery Barn’s kids section ($149). Just insert the hose, and place the arch over the top of your slide, making it rain a perfectly continuous stream of water onto your DIY slide. A great—and super adult—seasonal investment.
Fill your squirt bottle with some diluted shampoo and spray down the surface of your slide to increase its slipperiness. Reapply as needed. While many may remember using dish soap, I don’t recommend the substance since it’s not intended for use on the body, has a tendency to severely dry-out skin, or in my case, give me an extremely itchy rash. With that in mind, maybe best to go for that 2-in-1 conditioning shampoo just in case. This might be the only time I recommend anyone use that crap.
PRO TIP: This is one of the few situations in life where being drunk might actually help.