Queer Guide 2024 Today 3:42 AM

Find Queer Comedy Tonight!

Our roundup of the best queer (and queer adjacent) comedy shows in Portland.

[Find the Mercury's Queer Guide in print—available in more than 500 spots citywide!—eds.]

Portland’s comedy scene is, hands down, one of the best in the nation, and that includes a tsunami of LGBTQ+ comedians and queer based (and adjacent) comedy shows. Seriously... there are so many! Here’s a roundup of some of the best—and most inventive—queer comedy nights in the Portland area, for whenever you need a laugh!

Be Gay, Do Crime

One of the funniest (and most educational!) comedy shows in town, Be Gay, Do Crime features a storytelling format in which comedians share stories about their fave queer “rebel” icons throughout history. Host Jenna Britann says the show grew out of “a desire to connect to our trailblazing LGBTQ+ ancestors that came before us—many of whom are neglected or straight-washed in our history books.” Co-hosted by Joe John Sanchez III, Be Gay, Do Crime is instructional, goofy, and thoughtful, with an extra dash of fun provided by audience members who share their own past “crimes” for the riffing pleasure of guest comedians (who have included Mx. Dahlia Belle and Armaaan Singh)—and yep, there are prizes to be had as well!
Schilling Cider House, 930 SE 10th, fourth Sunday of the month, 7 pm, $5

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Queer Guide 2024 Today 3:40 AM

Mona Chrome Is—Ironically Enough—a "Walking Crayon Box"

Gary Barnes sees drag as a way to combine their passions for painting, costume design, and dance—all at once!

[Find the Mercury's Queer Guide in print—available in more than 500 spots citywide!—eds.]

RuPaul’s Drag Race has had so many seasons and spinoffs that an entire generation doesn’t remember a time before RuPaul sent scores of drag superstars sashaying away. Portland drag artist Gary Barnes, who performs as Mona Chrome, is a member of that generation.

Barnes caught the drag bug watching Drag Race’s eighth season, which crowned the comedian Bob the Drag Queen. A Clackamas High School student at the time, with a passion for the arts, Barnes soon dreamed up their alien superstar alter ego, Mona Chrome. Then and now, Barnes is a painter, illustrator, costume designer, and avid dancer.

“I went ‘Oh, this is a combination of all the things I like to do artistically, all into one,’” they told the Mercury.

Wanting to name themself after a pun, Barnes struck upon Mona Chrome—not only for the allusion to color theory, but also as a reference to the Mona Lisa. None of Chrome’s costumes were ever monochromatic, and now she’s built up a wardrobe colorful enough to, as she puts it, “look like a walking crayon box.”

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Queer Guide 2024 Today 3:38 AM

All Pride All the Time

There’s something happening every weekend, as we count down to Portland Pride!

[Find the Mercury's Queer Guide in print—available in more than 500 spots citywide!—eds.]

Pride is in July again this year, but the queer fun lasts all summer long (and beyond). That’s why our roundup of summer queer events gives you plenty of dance parties, drag shows, and more, as we count down to Pride Weekend.

BLOCK PARTY

Scandals Patio Parties

Scandals, which we will soon have to qualify with “downtown," has embraced the eternal queer summer vibe, planning three weekend block parties: one in June for Pride month, one in July for Portland Pride, and one at the end of August to close out the season. Celebrate 18 years of Scandals’ street fairs—always epic, they shut off SW Harvey Milk to car traffic
and fill the whole street with daytime revelers.

Scandals, 1125 SW Harvey Milk, June 14-16, July 19-21, Aug 30-Sept 1, 21+


DANCE/DRAG

Black to Drag

DJs Mawmie and Dissolve pump the beats for a Juneteenth celebration honoring Black drag artists. Local queens Kimber Shade and Coco Jem Holiday host headliner (and RuPaul’s Drag Race alumna) A’Keria Chanel Davenport, with support from Mona Chrome, Wonderful, Viper, Oliver Clothesoff, Lala Benet, Cody James, and Cruz Daniels. BIPOC are eligible for a $10 discount with the code BLACKLIVESMATTER.

The Get Down. 615 SE Alder, Sat June 15, 8 pm, $25-$45, 21+

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Queer Guide 2024 Today 3:36 AM

EverOut's 2024 Pride Event Calendar

Don't miss a minute of fun during this year's Queer Summer!

[Find the Mercury's Queer Guide in print—available in more than 500 spots citywide!—eds.]

Community

Oaks Park Pride

Oaks Park celebrates the Portland queer community with a day of discounted rides, limited-edition treats, pride-themed carnival game prizes, special performances, and more. Did I mention free cake and balloons? You can stop by a vendor fair, play a few rounds of mini-golf, and even try out your moves on wheels at a special Pride edition of the popular Gay Skate at the roller rink. Amusement parks already trigger great joy for me, I can’t wait to go to one filled with queer folx and covered in rainbows. Oaks Amusement Park (Sun June 30) SL

Pride Beaverton 2024

The seventh annual edition of Pride Beaverton is channeling cosmic energy with the theme “We are all made of stars.” The festivities kick off at 11 am with a parade through downtown Beaverton, but the fun will continue all day. Sir Cupcake’s Queer Circus, drag musician Saint Syndrome, and ‘80s girl wave tribute band Blonde Neon are slated to bring their superstar energy to the stage. Plus, a vendor fair will showcase pride gear and other goods from local artisans. Beaverton City Park (Sun June 30) JW

Rainbow Ride!

Inclusivity is the word at this Pedalpalooza ride that invites LGBTQIA+, BIPOC, allies, and accomplices of all ages, abilities, and riding levels to show their pride on two wheels. Deck yourself and/or your ride out in vibrant rainbow colors, and head to the starting point at Colonel Summers Park for an approximate five-mile, flat route. The colorful contingent will end up at the Cart Blocks, where a party with three DJs and vogue dance performances by the Legendary House of Ada will go ‘til late o’clock. Colonel Summers Park (Mon July 1) JW

Pride Night Market

Most people know local nonprofit Pride Northwest as the group that puts on the pride parade, but this year they’re also partnering with Hotel Zags to host an evening market—everyone loves a night market! All are welcome to check out wares from LGBTQIA2S+ vendors (carrying everything from vintage threads to handcrafted goodies), get groovy on the dance floor, and enjoy a variety of snacks and drinks. Recommended mood: unleashing your inner fabulousness. The Hotel Zags (Fri July 12) SL

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The Mercury provides news and fun every single day—but your help is essential. If you believe Portland benefits from smart, local journalism and arts coverage, please consider making a small monthly contribution, because without you, there is no us. Thanks for your support! 

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! It's going to be sunny for the rest of the workweek, but as soon as the weekend hits, BAM—we're in for clouds and rain. But chin up, because the rain is good for gardens and will hopefully help ward off wildfire season a bit. 

Alright, time for the news. 

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Food and Drink Yesterday 8:01 AM

Portland Chefs Again Win Top Honors at the James Beard Awards

Oh, we were actually just talking about Langbaan and Gregory Gourdet being wonderful.

Oh, we were actually just talking about Langbaan being wonderful. And now they have a James Beard Award. Neat!

Just two weeks back, critic Andrea Damewood revisited reviews from her first year of food criticism for the Mercury, and highlighted the Slabtown prix fixe restaurant, dubbing it "absolutely essential Portland eating." She continued: "[Earl] Ninsom has built an empire of restaurants since the 2010s—Padee, Hat Yai, Eem, Phuket Cafe, Yaowarat—but Langbaan remains the jewel in his crown." 

On June 10, the James Beard Foundation awarded Langbaan the high honor of Outstanding Restaurant at their awards ceremony in Chicago. They also recognized Kann's Gregory Gourdet as Best Chef in the Northwest & Pacific region of the US.

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News Tue 4:45 PM

How a Food Bank Illuminated Cultural, Political Divides Over Gaza

The situation in Gaza has sent shockwaves through politics, universities, K-12 schools, and recently the Oregon Food Bank

The Oregon Food Bank (OFB) says it hasn’t seen a big financial loss since losing support from a number of Portland-based Jewish organizations after the food bank called for an “immediate and permanent ceasefire in Israel’s war against Palestine.” 

OFB says the loss in support is less a financial burden, but rather emotional. 

“We experience grief when our donors determine they can no longer support our mission,” Morgan Dewey, the media and engagement manager for OFB, said. “We have also heard from a number of people, including people who identify as Jewish in their communications with us, that they are increasing their support to Oregon Food Bank as a result of our statement.”

A dozen local Jewish organizations publicly pulled their support from OFB over the food bank’s recent statement, which condemned the terrorist attack by Hamas on Oct. 7, as well as the "indiscriminate attacks" by the Israeli army on Palestinians, including a strike on humanitarian aid workers delivering food to Gaza. The organizations say OFB's statement is antisemitic. Not everyone agrees with the move. 

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Savage Love Tue 11:25 AM

Savage Love: Feathered Friends (With Benefits)

Grandma has a very... unusual... relationship with her pet parakeet. (Gulp.)

[Dear Readers: I’m traveling today. Please enjoy this infamous column from the first decade of Savage Love. — Dan]

As an avid reader of your column, I thought of you and only you for help with this problem. My grandmother, 78 and widowed, is a kind, generous woman who has seen her share of difficult times. She is a bit offbeat, but extremely conservative and religious. After my grandfather passed on, she purchased a lively little parakeet and named him Pretty Baby.

Pretty Baby has provided wonderful companionship and entertainment for my grandmother, even learning to speak to her. Pretty is an amazing mimic, repeating phrases she has taught him: “I love you,” “lock the door,” “give me kisses,” etc. The problem is the kissing… or what I recently witnessed the kissing leads to. One evening Pretty began to squawk “give me kisses, give me kisses” and my grandmother walked over to the cage and slipped one finger between the bars. Pretty Baby proceeded to “kiss” her fingernail and flutter about. Then my grandmother — my grandmother — purred, “Give Grandma lovin’, Pretty Baby, give Grandma lovin’.” She then turned to me and said, “Pretty Baby wants to give me lovin’ and he won’t quiet down until he does.”

Pretty Baby proceeded to screech more and more loudly, as he humped my grandmother’s finger. She also moved it back and forth for him. I was stunned and unsure of what was happening, so I sat quietly in my chair looking in the opposite direction, hoping I wasn’t really witnessing what I thought I was. My grandmother cleared things up quickly, saying, “He’ll calm down after he climaxes,” smiling away and continuing to repeat, “Give me your lovin’, Pretty Baby, give me your lovin’.” When Pretty Baby was finished, she looked back at me and said, “I better wash my hands!” I left minutes later, unable to process what had just happened. Grandmother, however, never flinched, acting like it was an everyday occurrence.

I’m still horrified. Should I be concerned, Dan? About my grandmother? About Pretty Baby? Help!

Polly Wanna Wanker

I’ve been doing this job for a while now, PWW, and rarely do I get a question about a subject, sex act, position, kink, or bodily fluid that I’ve never had the pleasure of addressing before. But your question, PWW, is a first. And a treat! A grandmother whacking off her pet parakeet? That’s the kind of question I live for! I almost hate to admit it — I don’t want you to think I’m as sick a fuck as your grandmother is — but I was thrilled to receive your letter. Thrilled!

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The Mercury provides news and fun every single day—but your help is essential. If you believe Portland benefits from smart, local journalism and arts coverage, please consider making a small monthly contribution, because without you, there is no us. Thanks for your support!

Good morning, Portland! We're in for a high of 74 degrees with a visit from the clouds today. 🌤. If you've been too blissed out in the sunshine to pay attention to what's happening in the world, let's get you caught up.

In LOCAL NEWS:

  • Portland must be taking its austerity measures to new heights, because the city is now selling off a major possession. For the first time ever, a streetcar will be auctioned off. A Portland Streetcar spokesperson confirmed to KOIN6 that the car being put up for auction was a prototype debuted in 2012 that had operational issues and has been out of service for years. Anyone can bid on the 61,730-pound streetcar on govdeals.com, but the buyer must be willing to haul it themselves, at an estimated cost of at least $50,000. Who’s taking bets on how long it takes before this thing becomes a food cart? Continue reading »
Street View Tue 8:05 AM

STREET VIEW: Biketown for Who?

Portland deserves a better bike share program.

At the end of May, the Portland Bureau of Transportation (PBOT) announced upcoming adjustments to Biketown, the city’s Nike-branded bike share program. The changes involve cuts to Biketown for All: the popular, critical component of the bike share system that has allowed thousands of low-income Portlanders to temporarily rent electric bikes, essentially free of charge. 

Despite PBOT’s claims that the program scalebacks won’t have a dramatic impact on Biketown for All users, the announcement landed with a thud amongst local bike and transportation advocates, who see the move as a potential distress signal of what’s to come. 

Biketown, which launched in 2016, is named in honor of the city’s strong bicycling legacy and culture. The program is a partnership between PBOT and Lyft, with Nike contributing some funding and giving the orange bicycles their “Nike bikes” nickname. The program has evolved a lot since it launched eight years ago, and by many measures, it’s been a great success. 

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Queer Guide 2024 Mon 3:09 PM

This Portland Gay Bar Is Opening a Family-Friendly LGBTQIA+ Lounge

Since spring, we've wondered about "Scandals East." Here's the plan.

In keeping with the bar's title, Scandals found itself the subject of rumor this spring, after architect Iain MacKenzie tweeted out a liquor license application for a "Scandals East" on NE Alberta. The gossip engine roared to life—was the downtown location moving? Was it closing?
 
It is not, but Scandals East won't be more of the same. The bar's owner David Fones confirmed with the Mercury that he's planning a family-friendly LGBTQIA+ lounge with food, a full bar, and a large outdoor patio space, to open this summer in the big orange house that occupies the corner of Alberta and NE 9th.
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EverOut Mon 12:09 PM

The Top 47 Events in Portland This Week: June 10–16, 2024

Portland Book Week, Cavetown & Mother Mother, and More

It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new week...and we're feeling good. Go forth and enjoy yourself at events from Portland Book Week to Juneteenth Oregon and from Cavetown & Mother Mother at Edgefield to John Malkovich in The Music Critic at the Symphony.

MONDAY

FILM

Mississippi Records Music & Film: Chess of the Wind
If Chess of the Wind doesn't sound intriguing to you, I don't know what will: Mohammad Reza Aslani's banned and forgotten gem of the pre-Revolution Iranian New Wave (literally, it was found in an antique shop in 2014) is a fashionable, queer murder mystery. The film follows the venomous heirs of a matriarch's estate as they connive each other from the shadowy wings of a candlelit mansion (as a Succession fan, I'm listening) and features an eerie Sheida Gharachedaghi score. Thanks, Mississippi Records! LINDSAY COSTELLO
(Hollywood Theatre, Hollywood District)

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The Trash Report Mon 9:59 AM

THE TRASH REPORT: Commence Tiny Bitch Summer!

Line up for your bowl of the week's hottest (and trashiest) gossip!

Hello, baby angel Trash Pandas, and welcome to The Trash Report! I'm your girl, Elinor Jones. I am really glad that June is Pride Month because if the month was up for grabs, I could be tempted to be one of those people who try to celebrate "birthday month;" since I know I cannot compete with Pride, I mostly ignore my birthday, like a normal middle-aged woman. But if you want to get me something, may I interest you in a local abortion fund? OR tell your crush you like them. OR seek vengeance for something. I can be flexible!

Couple Gossip!

The universe's stars must be in alignment, because the human stars? They are horny AF! Sabrina Carpenter, the songstress responsible for "Espresso," AKA the best ear worm since RFK Jr's died, just released a fun and steamy video for her new single "Please Please Please." The video stars her boyfriend, Barry Keoghan. These two are giving the sultry slutty young relaysh vibes that they were trying to sell us with Glen Powell and Sydney Sweeney had last year—I could never fully get behind those two because they look like they were generated by AI* by simply prompting "hot white heteros." Barry and Sabrina are hot too, but also interesting, sexy, a little dangerous, and maybe kinda mean? Like Glen and Sydney would break your heart by ghosting you, but they'd never tell anyone else your secrets, whereas Barry and Sabrina would get a tattoo of your name and then try to run over you with their car. Tiny bitch summer, here we come.

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The Mercury provides news and fun every single day—but your help is essential. If you believe Portland benefits from smart, local journalism and arts coverage, please consider making a small monthly contribution, because without you, there is no us. Thanks for your support!

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! Get ready for another week of gorgeous weather, with sunny-sun skies and highs hovering around 78-80 all the damn way until Saturday. Now let's hover—in a non-creepy way—around some NEWS.

IN LOCAL NEWS:

• Looks like whether anyone likes it or not, District Attorney-elect Nathan Vasquez has already started some sneaky backroom deals in which he convinced Multnomah County commissioners to give him $782,000 so he can get a jump on prosecuting lower level drug offenses when he takes office in January. This is despite the fact that we don't have enough defense attorneys to handle the extra caseload (or jail space), the public was not allowed their chance to sound off on how taxpayer money should be used, and... what else? OH, he doesn't even have the goddamn job yet. (Trust me, People for Portland won't be putting up billboards around town about that.) Our Courtney Vaughn has all the details.

• Portland romance writer Crampton Brophy, who's serving a life sentence for murdering her husband in 2018, is appealing the conviction on of what she claims were several errors committed during her trial—most pointedly, the prosecution asking a winky question about her book How to Murder Your Husband, which was not allowed into evidence. The state must decide by August whether or not to entertain the appeal.

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