Quick - down your last couple $5 cocktails before the Mercury's Highball shuts down on Sunday: You're gonna need the extra energy to get through all the good stuff the city has to offer this weekend, not least of which being the star of The Daily Show holding court at the Theater of the Clouds, or Portugal. The Man helping lead a March for Our Lives. The Portland Thorns return to save football, The Helio Sequence helps OPB Music turn 10, Blowpony turns 11, and oh yeah, Hamilton is still singing at the top of its lungs, which is good because it has to compete with the Oregon Symphony live-scoring Jurassic Park downtown. It's a damn full weekend; hit the links below and load your plate accordingly
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Friday, Mar 23
The Helio Sequence, Kelli Schaefer, Natasha Kmeto
Happy 10th anniversary to OPB Music, which is the tuneful arm of our local public broadcasting station that regularly features indie/alternative acts⊠especially those of the local variety. And to celebrate this grand occasion theyâre inviting YOU (and the rest of Portland, I guess) to a very special night of music headlined by beloved local indie rock outfit the Helio Sequence, who will be joined by the dark, powerful voice of Kelli Schaefer, and the sensuous dance floor bangers of Natasha Kmeto. Itâs a great way to celebrate OPB Music and our fantastic local music scene. WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY
8 pm, Crystal Ballroom, $15, all ages
Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin's Let's Get Awkward tour returns to Portland, giving the comedian and former Daily Show correspondent the chance to showcase his eccentric brand of stand-up and his fabulous mop-top haircut all weekend long at Helium Comedy Club.
Mar 23-24, 7:30 pm, & 10 pm, Helium Comedy Club, $35
Shopping, Lithics, Conditioner
UK post-punk revivalists Shopping have this weird way of accommodating any vibe that comes their way. The trioâs songs are multi-use marvels that will dance with you if you feel like dancing, pace with you if you feel like panicking, or console you if you feel like crying. Crucial progenitors like the Slits and the Au Pairs provide the DNA, so nostalgia is welcome here as well, but when I hear Shopping do their thing, I canât help but feel planted in a present that is giving me permission to simply be. Like buildings designed to shift, roll, and sway to withstand the violence of an earthquake, Shoppingâs songs are reactive compounds that use vulnerability to absorb and understand and respond to a world that is confusing and scary. To listen is to be invited into that realm of rawness and strength. What you do there is up to you. CHRIS STAMM
9:30 pm, Bunk Bar, $12-14
Vundabar, Ratboys, Lee Corey Oswald
The past five or so years have produced a huge wave of young bands who play emotionally candid, guitar-driven music that recalls various popular sounds of the 1990s and early 2000s, such as emo, pop-punk, and classic indie. Two of the better bands in this wave descend upon Mississippi Studios tonight: Vundabar, from Boston, skillfully walks the line between catchy and chaotic, sugarcoating its jagged art-rock with irrepressible melodies. The groupâs new album, Smell Smoke, explores the lessons learned by frontman Brandon Hagen while he spent years caring for a loved one in mental and physical decline. And Chicagoâs Ratboys released an album last year called GN thatâs full of warm, charming pop-rock songs laced with more than a hint of twang and headlined by songwriter Julia Steinerâs breezy voice and melodies. BEN SALMON
9 pm, Mississippi Studios, $10-12
Candi Pop: Girl Pop Edition
If you believe in the power of girl power, and pray to the gods of bubblegum pop, then apply a thick coat of Dr. Pepper lip balm, and head out to Candi Pop: Girl Pop Edition. This dance night is well known for heating up the floor with pop bangers from your fave women artists, but this special edition will include radio heroes of your youth including Mariah Carey, Britney Spears, Spice Girls, *NSYNC, Madonna, Destinyâs Child, and (SQUEEEEEEE!) S Club 7! Bring your insulin, because this is one sweet dance night.
9:30 pm, Holocene, $10-12
Flash Gordon
December 5, 1980 is a very notable date in film historyâit was the day that camp ascended to unassailable art. Before that Friday, the term was a synonym for clumsy, failed ambition, earnestness gone sour and turned to kitsch. And then, Dino DeLaurentiis, inspired by Star Wars and holding the rights to the property George Lucas wanted to make in the first place, plugged "camp" into Queen guitarist Brian May's amplifier stack, fed "camp" through designer Danilo Donati's sewing machines, and firehosed "camp" through cinematographer Gil Taylor's camera lens, the resultant mess expansively splattering the meaning of the word all over the delirious circus of ridiculousness barely holding orbit around the lunkheaded, beefy majesty of Sam J. Jones as Flash (ah-aaaaahhhhh!) Gordon, and praise Ming, cinema itself was forever altered. BOBBY ROBERTS
9:45 pm, Academy Theater, $3-4
Bizarre Love Triangle
A dance night dedicated to the glorious synth-pop sounds of the best in '80s-era new wave, with DJ duties gladly undertaken by local all-stars DJ Gregarious, Art of Hot, and the ornately named Narcissus My Reflection.
10 pm, The Liquor Store, $5
Jim Jefferies
An evening of stand-up with the Australian comedian whose carefully concocted blend of acidity and compassion has landed him a late-night talk show on Comedy Central and a headlining show at the historic Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall.
7 pm, Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, $39.50-182.50
The Minders, Blurred Out, The Zags
Singer/songwriter Martyn Leaper and his renowned Portland-via-Denver pop-rock outfit the Minders play an intimate hometown show at Turn! Turn! Turn! with assistance from Blurred Out and the Zags.
8 pm, Turn! Turn! Turn!, $5
This Will Destroy You, Amulets
If youâre looking for high-octane rock ânâ roll, this is most certainly not the gig for you. This Will Destroy You makes music from drums, bass, and heavily distorted guitars, but thatâs where any semblance to the standard definition of rock ends. The Texas band specializes in dramatic, atmospheric songs that often extend beyond the six-minute mark. Theyâve recorded music for numerous films and TV shows, including Moneyball, World War Z, Prom Night, and Criminal Minds. Though this show probably isnât for anyone seeking wild catharsis, those who enjoy immersive shoegaze soundscapes will be pleased.
9 pm, Wonder Ballroom, $18-20, all ages
Limp Wrist, Lebenden Toten, Xylitol, Petite, DJ Wienerslav
Influential Chicago hardcore band Los Crudos, fronted by Uruguayan-American vocalist Martin Sorrondeguy, came together in 1991 specifically to give voice to the Latinx community in the US. When Crudos broke up in 1998, Sorrondeguy and former members of other seminal hardcore bands formed the vegan/straightedge/queercore group Limp Wrist. Loud, fast, and unapologetic, Limp Wrist embraced queerness within what was largely a heteronormative subculture, but their message of empowerment and social engagement is every bit as important today as it was 20 years ago. As Sorrondeguy explained in an interview, âYou cannot identify as queercore and not have a greater scope of the world around you, in fact, being queercore or a gay/lesbian/queer/trans punk has opened up expanded dialogue and actions to make real equitable change in the scene and in the world." None of the band members have ever lived in the same city, and touring is rare, so tonight might be your only chance to catch Limp Wrist in person. SANTI ELIJAH HOLLEY
9 pm, Bossanova Ballroom, $10-12, all ages
The Best of Second City
The Second City Touring Company brings some of the best sketches, songs, and improvisations from the historic company's fifty-two year history out to the Newmark Theatre, offering you the chance to see where the likes of Tina Fey, Stephen Colbert, and Steve Carell got their stats, and get a glimpse of the up-and-coming talent that's currently inhabiting the Second City ranks.
7 pm, Newmark Theatre, $20.50-25.50
Saturday, Mar 24
March for Our Lives
Like the #Enough in-school walkouts last week, student organizers across the nation are rallying to march against gun violence in their communities. The protest will leave from the Park Blocks by 10:30 and will end at Pioneer Courthouse Square by noon for a performance by Grammy-winning rock band, Portugal. The Man. EMILLY PRADO
10 am, North Park Blocks
Trevor Noah
When a perma-sneering charlatan who maybe canât read has desecrated the White House, we look to heroes like The Daily Showâs Trevor Noah to get us through each and every so-sad-itâs-almost-funny news cycle. Noahâs sharp political commentary (like when he compared Trump to dictators like Idi Amin) has won my heart, and, okay, so have his dimples. Donât miss him when he brings his signature blend of truth serum to town. MEGAN BURBANK
8 pm, Theater of the Clouds, $39-75
Portland Thorns Season Opener
This afternoon, Portlandâs most decorated professional sports team opens up their 2018 NWSL title-defending campaign with a nationally televised match against last yearâs Shield winners and league runners-up, the North Carolina Courage. We wonât get to see the team in action here at home until April 15, but Portlandâs bid for a record-setting third NWSL title will be worth tuning into Lifetime from the start. While longtime Thornsâ fixture Allie Long has departed for Seattle, and international stars Amandine Henry and Nadia Nadim will be playing in France and England respectively, this team still has plenty of explosive firepower and veteran presence in its ranks. With Canadian legend Christine Sinclair leading the attack, Brazilian playmaker Andressinha joining up with Lindsey Horan in the midfield ranks, and defensive stalwarts Emily Sonnett, Meghan Klingenberg, and Emily Menges leading the back line ahead of 2018 NWSL Goalkeeper of the Year Adrianna Franch, the Thorns will once again be the best ticket in town for catching world class talent right here in our own backyard. CHIPP TERWILLIGER
Watch it on Lifetime at a sports bar or in the comfort of your own home!
Titus Andronicus, Rick Maguire
Listening to A Productive Cough, Titus Andronicusâ brand-new record, it's hard not to be impressed by the scope of their stylistic ambition, which forces the listener to view Americana through a scratched kaleidoscope. Earnest cantankerousness underscores each successive mini-opera touching on a bevy of influences, both urban and rural, in an attempt to validate the artistic quality of their New Jersey home. Singer Patrick Stickles projects his tattered odes with the aplomb of an enraptured punk troubadour while musically conjuring the Poguesâ audacious rootsiness, the Replacementsâ frayed edges, and Neutral Milk Hotel's pastoral whimsy to poetically contrast the stadium-sized emotional bombast thatâs endeared them to a well-earned cadre of fanatics. The countless hours of sweat-drenched performances and personal maturity have embedded themselves into these recordings, and anyone who's already been enjoying the bandâs raw soliloquies will definitely appreciate this new chapter. CHRIS SUTTON
9 pm, Mississippi Studios, $15
Portland Farmhouse & Wild Ale Festival
The return of Saraveza's annual brewfest dedicated to shining a spotlight on the Northwest's finest wild and rustic ales in styles from France and Belgium, with participating breweries including The Commons, Upright, Alesong, pFriem, De Garde and many more. Admission includes collectible glass and 10 drink tickets.
11 am, Saraveza, $25
LA Noche Latin Party
Star Theater hosts another installment of this Latin dance party, with DJ CJ and DJ Blas spinning the best Latin hits of the '80s, '90s, and 2000s.
9 pm, Star Theater, $12
Drowse, Tender Age, Floating Room, Dragging an Ox Through Water
Though Kyle Bates recorded Cold Airâhis newest album under the Drowse monikerâat home, its 12 shoegazey tracks sound like they were born surrounded by monolithic glaciers in some remote arctic landscape. Beneath the lo-fi fog of Mount Eerie-style production, Bates recounts his experiences with dissociating from reality, breaking down, and finding relief in medication. Itâs heavy, beautiful music. CIARA DOLAN
8 pm, The Know, $6
Videodrome
While David Cronenberg's cult classic Videodrome is still as powerfully queasy and uncomfortable as it was in 1983, time has made the film's prophetic commentary on our media-addicted culture feel a little quaint. Sure, the broad strokes are still cutting, and with professional shitheel James Woods leaving a sticky film on basically everything he touches (a role he took off the set and into real life, if his Twitter feed is to be believed), the correlation between entertainment industry and drug cartel is crystal clear. But Cronenbergâpossibly at his most cynically imaginative in Videodromeânever saw the internet coming. Hearing greasy fictional '80s executives talk about hundreds of TV channels in ominous tones doesn't play as strongly in a reality where someone's unattended six-year-old just livestreamed an eighth straight hour of PewDiePie into their head for the day. Long live the new flesh, indeed. BOBBY ROBERTS
9:30 pm, NW Film Center's Whitsell Auditorium
Starcrawler, Uni
Starcrawler is the latest band to come along thatâs supposedly going to save rock ânâ roll. The LA quartetâsome of whom are still teenagersâis fronted by Arrow de Wilde, whose live persona is already famously wild and theatrical, like some unholy offspring of Ozzy Osbourneâs blood-soaked teeth and Iggy Popâs shirt-optional swagger. Her band excels at fuzzed-out, scuzzed-up, gutter-dwelling rock ânâ rollâsometimes punky, sometimes grungy, sometimes bluesy, and sometimes all the above. And Starcrawlerâs self-titled debutâproduced by Ryan Adams and released earlier this year on Rough Trade Recordsâis not perfect, but it most definitely is a sweaty, sore-necked, streaked-makeup, blown-speakers good time. (This band is going to scorch all the pork belly at Bunk Bar.) Will Starcrawler save rock ânâ roll? Who knows. Weâve pinned our hopes on worse, thatâs for sure. BEN SALMON
9:30 pm, Bunk Bar, $12-14
Hamilton
You ever see the musical Paint Your Wagon? Itâs the lively tale of a gold-rush town that plunges into iniquity and vice. Clint Eastwood and the great Lee Marvin played the leads in the feature film. Lots of historical accuracies in that thing. I only mention it because, when your dreams of getting a ticket to the smash hit musical Hamilton are inevitably dashed to pieces, youâll need something to watch. DIRK VANDERHART
2 pm & 7:30 pm, Keller Auditorium, $80-500, Try your shot at the $10 Ham4Ham lottery!
TOAST
Sure, you like booze, but how sophisticated is your knowledge of it? At the Oregon Distillers Guildâs TOAST, youâll get to taste over 120 spirits from around the world, getting tipsy and learning about new innovations in hooch, for a not-bad-at-all price.
5 pm, Tiffany Center, $15-65
Blowpony 11 Year Anniversary
Portland's monthly queer-centric dance extravaganza celebrates its 11th anniversary with a special March installment featuring headlining performances from RuPaul's Drag Race season 3 winner Raja, Vancouver, BC-hailing drag troupe Man Up, and local favorites Nae Nae Dominatrix and Miss Inanna, along with music from DJs Airick X, Just Dave, Matt Consola, and Mateo Segade, and enough go-go dancing to keep the club rocking all night long.
9 pm, Bossanova Ballroom, $13-15
The Golden Girls: Live
A drag send up of the iconic sitcom, with RuPaulâs Drag Race Season 9 winner Sasha Velour and a talented cast of San Francisco-hailing drag comic performers acting out two episodes of the show.
7 pm, & 10 pm, Aladdin Theater, $30-60
Bricks Cascade
It's a LEGO convention! There's gonna be a ton of those things. Lego everywhere! For the love of God, do not be barefoot anywhere near this thing.
Mar 24-25, 10 am, Oregon Convention Center, $11, all ages
Sunday, Mar 25
Joseph, Becca Mansari
Thanks to its annual Alpenfest, which features yodeling and alphorn performances, the tiny town of Joseph, Oregon, has been saddled with the dubious nickname âOregon's Little Switzerland.â But fuck an alphorn! Joseph also inspired the name of Joseph, a trio of singing sisters, and if you're looking for gorgeous folk-pop, look no further. Sharing the bill is Nashville's Becca Mancari, making this whole thing a win-win, so long as you leave your alphorn at home. ERIK HENRIKSEN
8 pm, Revolution Hall, $32-35, all ages
Farewell, Control Yourself
JoAnn Schinderleâs moving to LA, and Iâm verklempt. When I first saw her stand-up, I realized my previous dissatisfaction with comedy had nothing to do with me, and everything to do with an industry that devalues women viewers. Schinderleâs jokes about periods and cleaning to BeyoncĂ©Â show how good comedy outside the boysâ club can be. Put on your boldest lip color in tribute and catch her final weekly showcase. MEGAN BURBANK
7 pm & 9:30 pm, Alberta Street Pub, $12
The Portland Mercury's Highball
Today is the last day to get in on the Portland Mercuryâs HIGHBALL! At each of Highballâs locations, youâll find specially crafted cocktails that are available only to Highball participants. Even better? Each of these fantastic, sanity-saving cocktails will be available ALL DAY (not just during happy hour!) and cost you a mere $5!
Various Locations, click here for a full list of participating venues and cocktail recipes
OMD
All nostalgia aside, OMD's back catalog is untouchable, a perfect time capsule of '80s synth pop without any of the gimmicks. In lieu of dancing to "99 Luftballons" for the 99th time at some tired '80s night, come see the real gems of that decade in action. EZRA ACE CARAEFF
8:30 pm, Wonder Ballroom, $30-35
Tyto Alba, Esmé Patterson, The Squiggle Trio
On her third solo album, We Were Wild, EsmĂ© Patterson sings folksy indie-pop thatâs endlessly sweet and bright. Instead of hunting for silver linings, on songs like the opening track, âFeel Right,â she warmly embraces gloom, since âWithout feeling wrong/How can we know what feels right?â CIARA DOLAN
8 pm, Firkin Tavern, free
Kristin Hersh, Grant-Lee Phillips
Whether sheâs fronting projects like Throwing Muses and 50FootWave or playing solo, Kristen Hersh has quietly contributed to the traditionally male-dominated world of indie rock for decades. Hershâs songwriting blends punk, indie, and folk, with lyrics that touch on her struggle with bipolar disorder. WILLIAM KENNEDY
8 pm, The Old Church, $20-25
Lindi Ortega, Hugh Masterson
The Nashville-via-Toronto singer/songwriter brings her storytelling and music back to Mississippi Studios for a headlining show supporting her new EP, Til the Goin' Gets Gone.
9 pm, Mississippi Studios, $15-17
Current Joys, Boyo, Nate Wey
Nick Rattiganâs having a busy year: The Los Angeles-based artist released and toured on an album from his cultishly popular surf-punk duo Surf Curse, directed a music video for Philadelphia indie rock band Girlpool, and is now releasing an ambitious video album for his solo project Current Joys (FKA Tele/Visions). A Different Age is Rattiganâs second full-length under Current Joys moniker, following his 2015 debut, Me Oh My Mirror. While it doesnât veer too far into new waters, the new record finds Rattigan coming into his own as an artist, hustling and struggling to support himself after moving to Los Angeles from his hometown of Reno. He sings over drum machine beats, layers of synth, and looped guitar riffs that shift from lonely tonal pulses to chaotic crescendos. A Different Age plays like the soundtrack to one long moment of quiet reflection in the midst of an existential crisis. CAMERON CROWELL
8:30 pm, Holocene, $10-12
Laurie Kilmartin
The comedian and writer known for her appearances at the Bridgetown Comedy Festival over the years returns with Dead People Suck, a heartfelt and humorous guide to coping with with death and grief without losing your mind.
7:30 pm, Powell's City of Books, free
Something to Talk About: A Portland Bonnie Raitt Tribute
Get your Bonnie Raitt fix tonight at the Rose where a slew of local singer/songwriters and musicians take the stage for an evening of tributes and collaborations in celebration of the queen of the bottleneck blues. With performances from Anne Weiss, Lisa Mann, Bre Gregg, Ara Lee, David Jacobs-Strain, JP Garau, Dan Stueber, Mark Bowden, and Bob Beach.
8 pm, Alberta Rose Theatre, $18-22
Jurassic Park
Conductor Norman Huynh leads the Oregon Symphony through John Williams' iconic score as Steven Spielberg's classic blockbuster plays behind them on the big screen.
2 pm, Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, $30-115, all ages
Just Desserts: A Bake Sale Against Gun Violence
Community bake sale organizers, Tracy Puhl and Chelsea Wright, are calling on Portlanders anew to buy baked goods for charitable causes. The entirety of money raised will benefit Everytown for Gun Safety, a gun control advocacy group and you can stock up on tasty treats like mini apple pies, butter mocha cake, and vegan leman coconut scones. Cash only!
10 am, Books With Pictures
Don't forget to check out our Things To Do calendar for even more things to do!
