MUSIC--Portland hair-cutting legend and record label owner (Vinyl Warning) Fred the Barber always cuts a rug on his birthday (man, I AM NOT FUNNY). This year, the big birthday bash stars the Misfits-inspired Minds, punk demons The Observers, and the Clorox Girls (who are blowing up btw), not in that order. His party will also be starring Fred himself, and birthday cake. Mmmm yeahhhh, birthday cake... KS
I.C. Mummy, 332 NE San Rafael, 9:30 pm, $3

THE VEGAS--Like the Vegas? Love the Vegas! Author Marc Cooper's new book The Last Honest Place in America: In Search of Paradise and Perdition in the New Las Vegas is a guided tour of the new corporate entity once known as Sin City. Cooper uses local sites and characters to explain how the Vegas went from a mob town to a corporate amusement park that defies all capitalistic expectations. Shuffle up and read! WSH
Powell's on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne, 228-4651, 7:30 pm, free

FRIDAY, May 7

POCOS PERO LOCOS--One of the greatest radio shows around is on 95.5 Sunday afternoons called Pocos Pero Locos, featuring the best in Latino hiphop and rap! Now the PPL Tour is bringing the muy caliente to Portland with firey stars such as Spanish Fly, Mexiclan, Knightowl, Chingo Bling, Blunts LLA, and host DJ Khool Aid. Trust us, this shit is on the real. See feature page 17 for more! WSH
Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside, 224-4400, 9 pm, $19, all ages

POLITICAL BRILLIANCE--If the hapless Democratic Party would only hire columnist Arianna Huffington as their advisor, Maybe then they would have a chance to dethrone the Bush dynasty. Both intellectually uplifting and morally crushing, Huffington is an intellectual heavyweight and one of the premier political observers EVER! Listen, learn, and act up! PB
First Congregational Church, 1101 SW 12th Ave, 7:30 pm, free!

SPACE PARTY--You don't need to have your feet planted on earth's surface to have a great dance party. Tonight a varied collection of the city's techno DJs and break-beat musicians sponsor an "Out of This World" dance party, replete with space-age costumes. Put on your dancing shoes and hop into orbit with Electrokid & Suff-X, Breakcake, Flipsta, and more! PB
Ohm, 31 NW 1st Ave, 9 pm, $8

SATURDAY, May 8

HAPPY B-DAY DANCE SOIREE--A recent informal poll voted Taurus "most likely zodiacal sign to sponge you down." Peep with the cutie bulls at Level's gianormous Taurus Party, DJ'd by a million DJs, and remember: we Taureans like to indulge, so freaking could happen. JS
Level, 13 NW 6th, 228-8888, 9 pm, $2 and 2 cans of food, or $5

EVIL HILLBILLY ELVIS--Imagine, if you will, the love child of Dukes of Hazard star Tom Wopat and the Misfits' Glenn Danzig, who with his deep-throated, melodic hardcore punk croon is often referred to as Evil Elvis. The offspring is American Nightmare, a "bluegrass Misfits cover band" that channels the spirit of Danzig with hillbilly form. JWS
Nocturnal, 1800 W Burnside, 8 pm, $5, all ages

SUNDAY, May 9

SCI-FI ASSUALT--There is no more harmonious thing in this world than Bloodhag's marriage of literate science fiction and ear-fucking assault rock. Probably the only metal band in history to do a library tour, these charming dudes from Seattle sing about Robert Heinlein, Isaac Asimov, and other sci-fi legends while pelting the audience with paperbacks. Funner than fun. JWS
w/Stovokor; Ash Street, 225 SW Ash, 9 pm, $7

MONDAY, May 10

PUNKY EASTERN EUROPEAN HODOWN--New York's vast population of gypsy-punk enthusiasts go bonkers over Gogol Bordello. And with a Ukranian cabaret-influenced, and a new DJ side proj called JUF that combines global beats with discotheque aspirations, who can blame them? JS
Berbati's Pan, 231 SW Ankeny, 248-4579, 9:30 pm

TUESDAY, May 11

BOOKS--Hey bookworms: Powell's is selling off 75,000 books at an outdoor sale in Pioneer Square. Take an hour off of staring at your computer or making lattes and enjoy some browse time. You can spend $20 and have your summer reading covered. KS
Pioneer Courthouse Square, SW Broadway and Yamhill, Tues-Thurs 9 am-8 pm

FILM--Recent trends in digital technology have made documentaries more popular than ever before, and allowed cool local groups like NW Documentary Arts & Media to flourish. Tonight the group kicks off a Spring seminar series with "Evolution of an Art," at which Jill Reese will present clips from a century of documentaries. See www.nwdocumentary.org for more info. JWS
Nocturnal, 1800 W Burnside, 8 pm, $5-10 sliding

WEDNESDAY, May 12

MUSIC--Though he's a local boy, we don't see too much of Matt Ward anymore. He's awfully busy touring the world after releasing his last album, Transfiguration of Vincent, and finally getting some much-deserved attention. Though the Ballroom might not be the most intimate setting for M. Ward's beautiful finger-picking and hushed singing, it will be a chance to see him rock with My Morning Jacket, who'll be serving as his backing band. MWH
Crystal, 1332 W Burnside, 225-0047, 8 pm, $15