THURSDAY, October 16

BOYCOTT COKE--It sounds like an outlandish plot on Alias: Coca-Cola hires U.S.-trained paramilitaries to bust up union efforts in Colombia. But don't tell Juan Carlos Galvis, a union leader in Colombia, that it sounds like fiction. Two months ago, someone tried to kill him. Now he's suing the beverage giant. Tonight he talks about globalization and U.S. foreign policy in South America. PB
PSU Smith Memorial Hall, Room 338, 725-7798, 7 pm, $5 donation requested

MUSIC--Not only is this show a benefit for the Orion Satushek memorial fund, it's saturated with great music--including the lovely Mirah, the screamy, VSS-like stylings of Hint Hint, and the coming-out party of CJB--including Caroline and Jason from Spooky Dance Band! JS
Nocturnal, 1800 E Burnside, 239-5900, 8 pm, $6, all ages

FRIDAY, October 17

ACCORDIONS--Experience gypsy encampment-style with "Revenge Of The Night Of The Living Accordion," an annual celebration of that oft-misunderstood, highly sexy instrument. Spit-roasting beasts, booze, fortune telling, and hula hoopers will help supplement the satisfaction of all your squeezebox perversions. MS
w/Black Cat Orchestra, Miss Murgatroid & Petra Haden, Mark Growden, Vagabond Opera, The Polka Hoop Boys; Gotham Building, 2240 N. Interstate, 493-2646, 9 pm, $7

HIPHOP--One of the freshest supergroups around consists of RJD2 on his signature soul-heavy, echo-y, crackly beats, and super Ohio rapper Blueprint killing on the verbiage. They're called Soul Position, their new record bangs, you'll love it live. JS
Nocturnal, 1800 E Burnside, 239-5900, 9 pm, all ages

DJ--Mr. Scruff's uptempo Trouser Jazz is enough to get even the most jaded dancing. His peppy beats create DJ madness that is the exact opposite of pretentious. Personally, I clean my apartment to Scruff's stuff all the time. It's a lot more fun that way. KS
w/DJ Spinna, See Music pg 17, Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison, 9 pm, $10-12

CABARET ALLUMAGE--Enjoy an evening of scantily clad, pancake makeupped dancers, sword swallowing, belly dancing, dingers, jugglers on unicycles, a six-piece live band, just like how old European people used to have fun before TV! And you won't have to deal with Liza Minelli or Renee Zellweger! MS
Fez, 316 SW 11th, 224-TIXX, 8 pm, $14

SUNDAY, October 19

CALFIONE--Love 'em or hate 'em, Califone's rockin' blues is studied and perfected. Combining ukulele, cello and electronics, Califone washes over you like the effects a pot brownie. Plus, their bassist wears a cowboy hat and he's not being ironic. Respect that. KS
w/Clem Snide; Dante's, 1 SW 3rd, 1-800-325-SEAT, 8:30, $10

MONDAY, October 20

MUSIC--Spend some time with your favorite negligibly drunken ex-schoolteacher-cum-rocker, Robert Pollard and his venerable band, Guided By Voices. Having the innate ability to expel perfectly crafted, treble-kicking pop nuggets, they remain a seminal influence in the realm of continually metamorphosing indierock. LC
w/The Go; Berbati's, 231SW Ankeny, 224-4400, 9 pm, $16-18

READINGS--Two great readings tonight, starting with Christian Parenti, the author of The Soft Cage: Surveillance in America. Think John Ashcroft is bad? Parenti postulates he's the tip of the snoopy iceberg. Were you a teenage bad girl? Don't miss the amazing Emily White reading from her book, Fast Girls: Teenage Tribes and the Myth of the Slut. White discusses the culture that gave you your bad rep. WSH
Parenti, Powell's City of Books, 1005 W Burnside. White, Powell's on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne, Both 7:30 pm, both free

TUESDAY, October 21

DJ CABARET--Multifaceted entertainer/DJ Kid Koala rolls back into town tonightÉand this time he's not alone. Backed by a turntable band, slide projectors and animated shorts, Koala (along with DJs P-Love and Jester) gets multimedia on your ass with The Short Attention Span Tour. It's like a modern-day cabaretÉ except interesting. WSH
w/Lederhosen Lucil, Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie, 233-1994, 8 pm, $12-14

WEDNESDAY, October 22

DJS--Some things are just more fun when done with a buddy. Examples: water-skiing, tug of war, gossipingÉ DJing? I know, it's crazy but Craig and Ross are a DJ team known by the title DJ Me DJ You. They play cheery beats that go great with a chillin' club atmosphere and cleavage, and worry not, these boys have a sense of humor. KS
Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison, 9 pm

READING--Like an angry Rottweiler, columnist and writer Molly Ivins has sunk her teeth into President Bush's hide and won't let go. One of the most clearheaded critics of the current administration, Ivins dogged Bush while he was governor of Texas and in her latest book, Bushwhacked, Ivins again takes him to task. The truth will set you free! PB
First Congregational Church, 1126 SW Park, 7:30 pm, free