Can being a NASCAR photographer get you laid? (Tim Dybek, Poway, CA)
Actually, each NASCAR team has good-looking PR people, and they're all in nice European shoes, and just looking hot. You're looking at them all day, and you can just pop a wood anytime. There's something about a woman in a polo shirt with a team logo on it. So when the day's over, I smell like gas, exhaust, and sweat, but every time I get home, I'm ready for my own victory lap, if you know what I mean.
I've read that NASCAR is the entertainment branch of a worldwide white supremacy movement. Can you confirm this? (Betty Lombard, Gainesville, FL)
I don't know about that, but there are a lot of white people filling those bleachers. Hate to say it, but it's the truth.
Do you have a bunch of gay NASCAR shit all over your house? (Ron Killings, The Dalles, OR)
No, I usually give all that stuff to my family for Christmas.
What's the craziest thing you've ever seen at a race? (Sammy Friedman, Mesa, AZ)
Well, titties are everywhere, but I once saw "man junk" swinging around in Charlotte.
I bought a Dale Earnhardt commemorative plate out of Parade magazine but I lost my certificate of authenticity. Will this hinder the resale value? (Lauren Winters, Little Rock, AR)
What, do I look like the QVC to you? The certificate is probably on the back of the mayonnaise coupon you turned in at Piggly Wiggly. How about saving your money and moving out of Little Rock?
What would a good camera be if I wanted to see in an upstairs window across the street? (Just Asking, Tallahassee, FL)
You'll need a high-end digital; six megapixels, at least. I'd go with 300mm, f2.8. Get the IS Image Stabalization. Helps you to see in low light. Send me your shots once you get them and I'll help you edit them.