Welcome to Blogtown’s newest feature, “Flavor Flav Suggests”—in which the much beloved hype man gives his suggestions on any number of topics… from inflatable kayaks to where one can purchase the best gelato. Today Mr. Flav appropriately gives his suggestion on where one should purchase their fireworks. Enjoy and be safe.

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)