More KICKSTARTER! news—because really, what other news is there? Gonna be kick startin’ something, so let’s get KICKSTARTING!

The Veronica Mars KICKSTARTER! movie is especially good for women—who are tired of being KICKED around, do you get it, I hope so, let’s move on to the next item.

After the success of the Veronica Mars KICKSTARTER!, Bryan Fuller wonders if he can do the same with Pushing Daisies and Wonderfalls—to which the rest of the world responded, “Who? And what?”

Similarly, creator Zachary Levi thinks a Chuck KICKSTARTER! is a good idea. To which the rest of the world responded, “IT IS NOT.”

The old ’60s German prisoner of war sitcom (!) Hogan’s Heroes is slated to become a movie—without a KICKSTARTER! (Oh, god. Thank you.)

And finally lest we forget, according to The Onion, KICKSTARTER! is a terrible, money-stealing cyber-criminal organization that robs innocent people for useless projects such as “a hand-knit scarf store, or an all-gay and lesbian improv festival.”

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

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