GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! She ain’t got that junk in her trunk, or the bump that you want, and the girl ain’t got the moves like I do. LET’S GO TO PRESS.
Not much local news is being reported today because the Oregonian spent their entire weekend pouring over 94,000 emails that so far are mostly showing how former Gov. John Kitzhaber strongly supported and promoted Cylvia Hayes’ efforts to promote green energy and protecting our oceans. The cad. What we also learned: Columnist Steve Duin really, really, REALLY does not like Cylvia Hayes (though I thought the part about her twirling her mustache was a bit much).
Oregon State has hired an out-of-state firm to determine if they bungled a 1999 off-campus rape charge.
The Timbers take down FC Dallas—check out all the hot recap action from Blogtown’s footy maestro Abe Asher!
Sen. Rand Paul (who makes Republicans both giddy and nervous) will probably announce his intention to run for President of the United States today.
Last Week Tonight‘s John Oliver interviewed Edward Snowden—and things got a little uncomfortable!
Rolling Stone magazine has apologized and pulled their feature story about a UVA rape accusation, after an independent review finds the mag failed to follow “basic journalistic practice.”
Rick Santorum cites the homophobic Westboro Baptist church in a failed analogy about religious freedom laws.
A New York judge has ruled it’s okay for a woman to serve divorce papers via Facebook message—which means it’s okay for me to break up with people over Twitter, right?
An Oklahoma reserve sheriff’s deputy accidentally kills a suspect after confusing his “taser” for a “gun.” In the officer’s defense… umm… I’ll get back to you on that.
Presidential hopeful Jeb Bush accidentally labeled himself as “Hispanic” on his voter registration form. Again, in his defense… geez, I’m having a tough time defending people today.
California governor Jerry Brown defends his mandate for state citizens to cut back on water usage by 25 percent—except for farmers.
The owner of a former “revenge porn” website has been sentenced to 18 years in prison. All together now… HA. HA. HA.
Now here’s what’s going on in your neck of the woods: Mix of clouds and sun today—though the sun returns in earnest by Wednesday.
And finally, here are three eggs you didn’t find.
To say merely that Kitz ‘promoted’ Cylvia Hales seems to be quite a stretch Hump.