Thursday,
March 28
8:00 CBS SURVIVOR: MARQUESAS
In their continuing quest to screw with the contestants’ minds, one tribe is allowed to steal members from the other.
10:00 VH1 PORN TO ROCK II
Porn stars prove they have other skills besides doing the UNNH-UNNH freak nasty.
Friday, March 29
8:00 CBS AFP: AMERICAN FIGHTER PILOT
Debut! Three hunky chunks of meat compete for the “Top Gun” flying program.
8:00 E! TRUE HOLLYWOOD STORY
Behind the scenes on the bitch-slappingest nighttime soap opera ever, Dynasty!
Saturday, March 30
8:00 DSC WILD AND WEIRD
Unusual and bizarre sex acts of the animal kingdom. Woo-hoo! Get those VCR’s rolling!
9:00 LIF CO-ED CALL GIRL–Movie
The fun of prostitution begins to wear thin for a sorority gal.
Sunday, March 31
8:00 ABC THE TEN COMMANDMENTS–Movie
How’s this for an 11th Commandment? “Thou shalt not program an old bullshit Christian movie instead of a new episode of Alias!”
8:00 WB THE JAMIE KENNEDY EXPERIMENT
Jamie fakes a marriage proposal on the big screen at a basketball game. Oh-ha-ha-ha, but what about the bride-to-be?
Monday, April 1
10:00 ABC ONCE AND AGAIN
Grace finds herself neck deep in trouble, when she attempts to seduce her teacher Eric Stoltz!
Tuesday, April 2
8:30 FOX ANDY RICHTER CONTROLS THE UNIVERSE
Andy is faced with a critical choice after discovering his new girlfriend is a bigot: bone her and dump her, or bone her and keep her?
10:00 FX THE SHIELD
Wow! Check out this dirty-talkin’, well-written new cop show based on the real-life corruption of the LAPD!
Wednesday, April 3
9:30 FOX GREG THE BUNNY
Jimmy’s new girlfriend has two sweet dogs–who only want to rip off poor Greg’s head!