PINK MARTINI—Celebrate all things pink and alcoholic
with the global lounge-pop of local luminaries Pink Martini,
including a special appearance by singing screen siren Jane
Powell who narrates the ensemble’s performance of Peter and The
Wolf. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 7 &
10:30 pm, $36-75.75

LOCAL ROCK—Bring it all back home with a triple bill of
Portland power-popsters. w/Throwback Suburbia, Black Mercies, Mark
Twain Indians; Ash St. Saloon, 225 SW Ash, 9:30 pm, $8

PRINCE VS. MICHAEL JACKSON—Determine the true King of
Pop at this themed dance party. (I predict Prince wins by a nose.
Zing!) w/DJ Dave Paul, Indica Jones; Berbati’s Pan, 10 SW 3rd, 9 pm,
$10-12

THRESHOLD—Embark on an adventurous new year with this
extraordinary night of art, sound, dancing, and other indescribable
phenomena. w/Kraddy, Eskmo, Welder, Chris Sia, Solovox, Saqi, DJ
Globalruckus, Hydrive, Gradual Meltdown, Nicoluminous, Leif James;
Rotture, 315 SE 3rd, 9 pm, $20-25

AULD BHANG SYNE—Move to the best of Bollywood and
Bhangra at this dance party with DJ Anjali and the Incredible
Kid. The Cleaners at the Ace Hotel, 403 SW 10th, 9 pm,
$20

KINKY FOR A CAUSE—Wear a mask and not much else at
Darklady’s Erotic Masquerade: The folks from swingers.com will be filming it
all—for charity! (You might want to pass on the potluck.) w/DJ
Darknezzz; Club 6124, RSVP required, info at darklady.com, 7 pm, $25-35

RHYTHM OF THE NIGHT—Cancel your plans for 2008, because
’80s superstar El DeBarge is gonna ring in your new year, and
you’ll need all 12 months to recover from this evening of awesomeness.
w/Lakeside; Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside, 9 pm, $45,
21+

KARAOKE FROM HELL—So the ball drops, you guzzle some
champagne, and the party’s over, right? WRONG! The Karaoke from Hell
Band is gonna back up your vocal stylings for 28 HOURS STRAIGHT, from
New Year’s Eve all the way through 2 am on January 2! (Pack a lunch.)
Dante’s, 1 SW 3rd, 10 pm, $10-13

FEMALE IMPERSONATION—Sure, New Year’s can be a drag,
but that doesn’t have to be a bad thing if you ring it in at this
Portland institution of 41 years. Darcelle XV, 208 NW 3rd, 9 pm,
$45-65

FIR BALL—Can’t decide which of David Lowery’s bands you
like best? No need to choose, because Camper Van Beethoven and
Cracker face off in an epic New Year’s battle of quirky
alt-rock. Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside, 9 pm, $40

SUNDOWN MACHINE—Hide out with the beautiful people as
slabs of psychedelic rock are spun in the subterranean cavern of inner
Southeast’s newest venue. w/Rick & Amy Bain, Matt Hollywood,
Brian Coates, DJ Plucky Warlock; East End, 203 SE Grand, 9 pm,
$5

SHUT UP AND DANCE—DJ Gregarious spins rock, pop,
and dance tunes that’ll bounce your ass clear into next year. Fez,
316 SW 11th, 9 pm, $10

AFROBEAT—I bet the talking drum quotient of your 2007
was sadly lacking. Turn that trend around with the horn-laden funk of
Jujuba. Goodfoot Lounge, 2845 SE Stark, 9 pm, $15

DANCE PARTY—The new year can be a time for reflection
and resolution, but you’ll have way more fun shaking your ass to this
fantastic lineup of DJs. w/Linger & Quiet, DJ Beyonda, DJ
Linoleum, DJ 1996 Olympics; Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison, 9 pm,
$10-12

TOP O’ THE NEW YEAR—Spend your December 31 like it’s
March 17 with the Irish punk of Amadan. w/Grafton Street,
Kells Pipers; Kells, 112 SW 2nd, 9 pm, $25

GET TAUGHT—Groove to the funk of Dr. Theopolis at the Kennedy School, and book a room if things get a little too
greasy. w/Redray Frazier; Kennedy School, 5736 NE 33rd, 9 pm, $35,
21+

BLACK & WHITE & GREEN BALL—There’s only one
thing to guarantee the happiest of New Year’s, and that’s cold, hard
CASH. Faux-Irish bar/club McFadden’s is hiding 500 big ones inside one
of the balloons that drop at midnight. McFadden’s, 107 NW Couch, 9
pm, $20-25

MUSIC & MEMORIES—Join Portland music legend
Jerry Joseph on a survey of his varied musical past, the climax
of a year-end local four-show stint. w/Casey Neill & the Norway
Rats, My Revolver, Craig Greenberg; Mt. Tabor Legacy, 4811 SE
Hawthorne, 9 pm, $20-25

WAREHOUSE BASH—Shake those last remnants of 2007
good-bye at this all-encompassing celebration that includes
performances by MarchFourth Marching Band and Dahlia.
w/DJs Heather, Ravi, Mercedes, Loki, Zita; On Air, 1300 N River
(under the Fremont Bridge), 8 pm, $25-30, all ages

CHOCOLATE—Giving up sweets for the new year? This
buffet of all-things-chocolate is your last chance to suck down some
ice cream, cake, mousse, ganache, and—why not?—chocolate
beer. Pix Patisserie, various locations, 11 pm, FREE to first 100
customers w/purchase of beverage

HUGE ‘N’ SWANKY—The Champagne Ball is an enormous
affair, with live music by 5 Guys Named Moe, DJs on four
different dancefloors, a karaoke lounge, and more; a portion of the
proceeds go to benefit the Portland chapter of the Friends of Children
nonprofit. Portland Hilton, 921 SW 6th, 8 pm, $75-95

WU-TANG CLAN, FOR REALS—Wu-Tang. Roseland. New
Year’s. ‘Nuff said. w/Cool Nutz, Sandpeople, Lilla D’Mone, DJ Mello
Cee; Roseland, 8 NW 6th, 9 pm, $40, all ages

2008-BIT—Get down to the thick beats and old-school
synths of Copy, and then come back up to the expansive dementia
of Panther. w/DJ Brokenwindow, DJ Hostile Tapeover; Someday
Lounge, 125 NW 5th, 9 pm, $10 or $20-25 for four venue pass

TONY STARLIGHT—There’s no better way to launch into the
future than by reliving the past with a classy evening of jazz and
comedy. Tony Starlight’s Supper Club, 3728 NE Sandy, 8 & 10:30
pm, $10-55

SHANGHAI NIGHTS—The Everyone Orchestra features an all-star cast of jam-pickers at a bash that includes stilt
walkers, painters, hula hoopsters, and more. w/Strings for Industry,
Freak Mountain Ramblers; Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, 8 pm, $35,
21+

WAREHOUSE PROJECT 2—The location is still under wraps,
but visit redcubepdx.com or call
972-1115 on the 31st for information on this giant dance party that
will have at least two dozen DJs and three dancefloors: a drum ‘n’
bass/jungle room, a breakbeat room, and a house/techno room. w/DJs
Adam F, Wyatt Earp, Noah D, Simply Jeff; advance tickets at brownpapertickets.com, 9 pm,
$20-25, all ages

STRIPPERS—So you’re a grownup now, and you can spend
New Year’s any way you please. And damn it, you want to see naked
ladies and fire dancers, with some badass rock bands providing the
soundtrack. w/Western Aerial, Tripolar; Devil’s Point, 5305 SE
Foster, 9 pm, $5