Justin Bieber goes to Hooters!

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50 Cent disses Justin Bieber on Twitter; learns the fury of the Bieber Army will not be trifled with!

Four-year-old Madison sees Justin Bieber kissing another girl and has an EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN of epic proportion. Get this kid to a grief counselor, stat!!

And finally, world’s greatest (and perhaps gayest?) dad performs an amazing background dance to Justin Bieber’s “Baby.” Daaaaad! You’re embarrassing us!!!

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

4 replies on “Good Morning, News about Justin Bieber!”

  1. Dear Four-year-old Madison: If u ever get to read this, it`s not worth it to cry cuz you see cute guys making up. I see cute girls making up with ALL of my friends in the pub, and I have`d stopped crying. Now things are better.

    In the other hand, “The Dad” dances with a mix of lambada, and modern interpretative dance. Good choice. And a bit of New Wave. All of this should be kept somewhere safe for future reference, in like 100 years. For the department of Human Studies.

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