This just came in:

To the Lucky SOB that shares my name-

A woman wrote you a valentine in the last issue of the Mercury and it sounded a lot like a message that would have been written by a woman I have been interested in for quite some time. She did not write the message and was not interested. So I would urge you to please make the most of a wonderful Valentine’s Day gesture. Best of luck to you, though it would appear that you are pretty well stocked on that.

Sincerely,

Unlucky SOB

๐Ÿ™

More mostly successful Valentine’s Day messages can be found here.

Marjorie Skinner is the Portland Mercury's Managing Editor, author of the weekly Sold Out column chronicling the area's independent fashion and retail industry, and a frequent contributor to the film and...

6 replies on “The Saddest Valentine?”

  1. Not another SOB story. Change your name to something original, then this shit won’t happen to you. Also makes it easier for crazy exes to stalk you, and who knows, you might get a nostalgic hookup out of the deal.

  2. OK, I do feel bad for anyone dealing with unrequited “interested in.” But don’t tell the Mercury about it or SOBs like me *will* snark you.

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