I think that’s what the pope means. That and legal gay marriage will turn all straight women into carpet munching golf pros. Otherwise I don’t see how allowing same-sex couples to marry—the civil right, not the religious rite—presents a threat to the “the future of humanity itself.” The entire world population is not going to suddenly go gay and forget which hole shits babies if gays and lesbians and bisexuals are allowed to legally marry the same-sex partners we already have.

And this threat to the future of humanity stuff? Previous popes said the exact same thing about Lutheranism, democracy, equal rights for women, birth control, divorce, masturbation, abortion, etc., etc., etc. Just, you know, for the record and shit.

In addition to being a nationally syndicated sex advice columnist, the author of several books, and the host of the Savage Lovecast, Savage is “a deviant of the highest order” (Daily Caller)....

4 replies on “Pope: Legal Gay Marriage Will Turn All Straight Men Into Cocksucking Power Bottoms”

  1. Following through on this logic, the obvious conclusion is that gay marriage could potentially SAVE humanity… because we currently have a serious overpopulation problem that will only get worse with time.

  2. At the same time, you’ve got to admit that those vestments are fabulous and that metal purse they carry is smokin’ (literally).

Comments are closed.