Last Friday I met up with local artist and PNCA professor Sean Joseph Patrick Carney to talk Fucking James Franco. It's a book of erotic fiction about actor/artist/writer James Franco that Carney's putting together with Container Corps' Gary Robbins. Included are contributions by artists cum writers from various locations across the country and in Portland.
When I first heard about the project, it was a fledgling Kickstarter. Rather than re-post the Kickstarter video (above) and call it done, I asked Carney for samples from the book. After a few weeks, the text arrived in my inbox, and by the time I met up with Carney, the project had gotten daps from The Onion's A/V Club, as well as Jezebel, Gothamist, and others. Moreover, the $2000 Kickstarter was 75% funded and Carney was less about soliciting launch cash and more in a cheers-to-that phase of the project (which is now fully funded!).
He immediately dispelled speculation that James Franco might be the puppeteer behind it all. The speculation, propagated by the A/V Club, isn't entirely baseless— remember Franco's Museum of Non-Visible Art, or his conceptual General Hospital episodes?— but if you know Carney's work or his book imprint, Social Malpractice, Fucking James Franco is a fitting extension of the canon. (For comparison, consider Carney's Jaoquin Phoenix's Donner Dance Party, composed of a comedic essay about Jaoquin Phoenix, plus lyric sheets for a 30-minute hip-hop concept album about the Donner Party— which, once upon a time, was performed by Carney, costumed as Phoenix.)
As many of Carney's projects marry irreverence and sincere fascination, Fucking James Franco follows— some pieces are dutiful to eroticism while others are wholly humorous, but all illustrate how ubiquitously discussed Franco is amongst artists. And as with other Social Malpractice titles, art theory and history play an active strain, bringing a little high-brow to the raunch. That said, the raunch is super entertaining, including scenes of prison lust, role-playing as performance art icon Marina Abramovic and her partner Ulay, and less hyperbolic, straight-ahead dressing room scrump.
The following excerpts are from contributors' original submissions to Fucking James Franco— these raw versions will appear edited upon official publication.
Before the jump, let's start with one of my favorite snippets, from Portlander Sally Gotfredson's “EIGHT POEMS TO SERVE AS A DECLARATION/EVIDENCE TO THE MUTUAL FEELINGS JAMES FRANCO AND I FEEL FOR EACH OTHER. TO BE READ BY JAMES FRANCO IN BED POST-INTERCOURSE WITH SALLY GOTFREDSON.”
ONE
Yeah, I’ve done sex
It felt good, I went to bed
But seeing you for the first time
In line
For the New York Times
In New York, which is where I live
And study
Felt like sex. But better. Like love.
For the first time.TWO
I love the way your mind works
It’s like watching my favorite episode of
How Things Work
More after the jump!
“For Immediate Release” by Brooklyn-based Emily Wolfer is a faux-press release announcing “five new additions to the James Franco Collection,” an imaginary line of “pleasure products.”
James Franco Edible Massage Dildo Candle — $24.95This bulging, phallic massage candle pleasures you, then melts from wax to oil in a heartbeat, gliding first into, then onto your skin for a hot, smooth-as-silk feel-up. Warm, fragrant, emollient. Formulated with a blend of skin-conditioning coconut oil, shea butter and James Franco imitation saliva. Melt it, rub it, suck it, lick it. Available in ten unique, sensual flavors:
James Franco, Original Scent
James Franco, Looking so Goddamn Beautiful in a Suit at the Oscars
James Franco, Wasted on Jameson and Feeling More Vulnerable Than James Dean
James Franco, Smoking a Joint
James Franco, Post Ass-Fucking in a Cheap Motel Room
James Franco, Naked in the Shower... Naked
James Franco, Dripping with Honey
James Franco, in a Hospital + Soap
James Franco, Rescuing You from Being Raped by a Truck Driver in the Middle of the Night While Hitchhiking Along an Arizona Freeway
James Franco, Waking You to a Fresh Pot of French Press Coffee + Morning Sex, Because He's Just That Fucking Thoughtful
“Two Lesbians Get Stoned” by Sydney S. Kim of Brooklyn takes place during the making of 127 Hours, in which Franco plays a man trapped under a boulder. The story features Franco projecting memories of a hunky lover named Hudson onto the boulder. Here's the moment when Franco begins seeing Hudson in the rock:
James moved his face toward the rock and puckered his lip, drew the stone into a closed-mouth peck. Hesitant, he parted his lips and slid out his tongue, the wet pink tip grazing over its stony pores. Warmth spread over his body, shot down from top of his spine straight down to his pelvis. It was then he knew that the rock was Hudson. There was no other way to approach this role, that was, from behind and on top.
And when things heat up:
With his left hand, James grabbed some pebbles from a surrounding ledge and thrust them down his pants. It was time to get dirty and rough, time to dive into the grime that this role required. He felt filthy, almost excessively and graphically non-monogamous. As if he had his hand up Hudson’s ass while simultaneously fucking Hudson’s shorter, less endowed friends. With gravel in his pants, he slapped the underside of the rock and rubbed up against it. He wondered if the friction would create a crack, if a fissure would form and break off the portion that trapped his hand.
The titular story is a bit more straightforward with the nasty bits, submitted under the name Arnonymous Poet. It takes place in Amsterdam and climaxes thusly:
But when I got to the asshole, he turned up a kind of gargoyle where I surely sought something more rosebud-esque.It was black from the number and size of things men had shoved in. An inch of the interior stuck out, forming thick wilted lips, droopy and slick like a panting dog’s. I skinned it back to see it extend even more. I squeezed my fist inside. Maybe James had passed out, because his face had a peacefulness I still don’t believe in. Or he was dead for a moment.
And finally, here's some role-playing from Nadia Buyse's “First Date,” in which Franco is cast as Marina Abramovic and the author as Abramovic's lover, Ulay:
“What did you say?” I asked. “If you have something to say you need to speak louder so that I can hear you and still keep fucking your tight little asshole.”“Call me Ulay.” He Whimpered. “I want you to call me Ulay!”
I started to scream with a faux Serbian accent “Take that dick Ulay, take all of it. Your art is not dangerous enough! Take my dick!”
“Yes. I’m Ulay, I need your discipline Marina.” he got out in between breaths “Now pull my hair! Spank my ass!”
I did as he requested, he started to moan louder. I started to fuck him harder. I could feel him getting ready to climax. He let out a scream and I felt his body begin to tremble as he shot his load all over my sheets. The sensation of his trembles shot through my body and made me explode like a volcano.
There's a whole lot more in Fucking James Franco, but we can't spoil everything! If you want more, there are still five days left to pre-order your copy through Carney's Kickstarter.
