Eggcetra
1501 NE Fremont
288-3766

I'm sad that I have to write this negative review, because the service at Eggcetra (I'm not even going to comment on the dumbness of the name) is stellar. You know when you meet one of those waitresses who seems like she is genuinely interested in being your friend, rather than just getting the tip? We had one of those. And just as I was leaving the restaurant, taking my final, scathing notes, the very same waitress came tearing out across the street in order to deliver an object we had left at the table. Ouch.

I expressed my great sorrow to my dining partner, who said the following. "I would be really, really angry with you if I read a glowing review and then ate at this place. You have a responsibility." She's right.

This Northeast café is about four months old, and is oddly painted in several hues of yucky purple, which is made yuckier with strange, '80s hair salon-like pictures. The other problems begin with the menu, which is a fine range of omelets, scrambles, and sandwiches, but which is then complimented with no less than 20 specials, all scrawled in different color ink on two whiteboards, causing great confusion for the eater (and the chef, I imagine).

There are places I will pay $6.25 for breakfast, but Eggcetra is definitely not one of them. I will not pay, for example, for a side dish of potatoes that is not only cold, but also clumpy and prepared in an unidentifiable, mediocre way (are they mashed? Or fried?). Moreover, good hollandaise is thick, buttery, and lemony, not grainy-thin and mayonnaise-ish. And meat, in that dish, should be fresh, unprocessed, and tender.

That's not to say there's nothing good about the place. The key here is to stick to the basics--order simple scrambles, sandwiches, etc. On another visit, I had a perfectly lovely BLT (well, okay, the bacon was a bit too crispy) and the orange juice was almost perfect--freshly squeezed and served in hearty portions. I only wish the rest of the food was as appealing as the wait staff.