Frank Cassano

Since 2000, Frank Cassano has authored “Frank Cassano’s Imbecile Parade,” the only worthwhile thing in the Portland Mercury. His interests include fuck you.

Recent Articles

The Failure Parade

A look back at the Mercury’s most unsuccessful “New Columns.”

Imbecile Parade with Frank Cassano

The triumphant (?) return of (arguably?) the Mercury's greatest columnist.

— Advertisement —
Imbecile Parade Sep 27 4:00 AM

Frank Cassano’s Imbecile Parade

Should the Mercury Have a Conservative Columnist?

— Advertisement —
Comedy Aug 22 4:00 AM

Frank Cassano’s Imbecile Parade!

This Week’s Question: What Do You Think of Portland’s New E-Scooters?

— Advertisement —
Comedy May 23 4:00 AM

Frank Cassano’s Imbecile Parade

This Week’s Question: What’s Your Favorite Fun Summer Activity?

New Column! Feb 14 4:00 AM

Frank Cassano’s Imbecile Parade

This Week’s Question: What Are Your Valentine’s Day Plans?