Another dick rises to head up the trillion-dollar company.
Another dick rises to head up the trillion-dollar company. Charles Mudede

In a press release on Tuesday, Amazon announced that Jeff Bezos will step down as CEO of the company and that Amazon Web Services director Andy Jassy will step up to run operations.

Bezos will settle into his new role of "executive chair," where he will "focus on new products and early initiatives," the Seattle Times reports.

One can only assume those projects include...

Doing this creepy shit...

Hanging out with those freaky Boston Dynamic dogs...

Playing with his rocket...

Allegedly taking dates to Captain Blacks (according to one source who saw him at that bar!!)...

Anyhow, the Seattle Times also reminds us that Bezos had more or less already stepped back from the running company before the pandemic hit, but then jumped back in to direct the company as it raked in huge profits due largely to stay-at-home orders.

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During this time, he also hung out with execs in a meeting as they announced attempts to smear a Black warehouse organizer as "not smart or articulate," oversaw the company as 20,000 of its workers contracted COVID-19, looked on as its managers engaged in an "anti-union blitz" in Alabama, and probably didn't bat an eye as its lawyers settled a $61.7 million lawsuit alleging wage theft of delivery drivers.

We'll see if Jassy follows Bezos's footsteps. But one thing's for sure: Guy Palumbo is probably pretty happy right now. The architect of Amazon's failed $1.5 million takeover of the Seattle City Council is "a friend" of Jassy's, according to Bloomberg.

During the 2019 elections, Jassy joined other Amazon execs in backing Egan Orion, who reportedly would have been Jassy's councilmember had his friend Palumbo not failed him.