Think you get too much of me during the week? Well, wait until you see this weekend! I AM PERFORMING IN TWO SEPARATE EVENTS THIS WEEKEND, AND IT WILL BEHOOVE YOU TO ATTEND ONE, BOTH, OR NONE. The details from the Mercury arts calendar:

Back Fence PDX: Design Week

When: Fri., Oct. 11, 9 p.m.

A Russian Roulette-style storytelling event with a fashionista bent, featuring Shelley McLendon, Adam Arnold, Kate Bingaman-Burt, Nicole J. Georges, Barbara Holm, Aaron Rayburn, Wm. Steven Humphrey, and Leather Storrs.

The Secret Society, 116 NE Russell

That's a great lineup, and these events are always verrrrry fun and funny. TRY TO COME TO THAT! Now let's continue our "Weekend with Humpy" tour with Saturday night's event, courtesy of Alison Hallett's My, What a Busy Week entry:


CABARET—If you haven't seen Mercury Editor in Chief Wm. Steven Humphrey's world-famous Taylor Swift puppet show, you'd better hustle your bustle to tonight's installment of vaudeville/variety show Miz Kitty's Parlour, for the last public performance of one of the most awe-inspiring artistic achievements of the modern era. (Also, music! Flappers! Other old-timey stuff!) AH

Mission Theater, 1624 NW Glisan, 7 pm, $12-15

Did you see that? Where Alison said, "one of the most awe-inspiring artistic achievements of the modern era"? That's not hyperbole, my friend—THAT'S FACT. (Plus there will be also be singing, dancing, and a foot-stompin' New Orleans-style brass band. FUN!) And I'm retiring this show after this performance, so move it or lose it. And finally on Sunday:

Join Wm. Steven Humphrey at his house this Sunday morning, as he rises hungover from bed at 11:30 am, stumbles around the kitchen blindly searching for coffee that isn't there, before finally screaming "FUCK IT!!!", doing a bong hit, dropping an Ambien, and falling back asleep for the rest of the afternoon.

I guess I'll be seeing you this weekend!