The last few months I've been getting a kick out of a regular feature at The Hairpin where writers/bloggers Julie Klausner and Natasha Vargas-Cooper tackle the classic game Fuck/Marry/Kill. For beginners, this is a game in which you choose three people, usually celebrities, and decide which one you would fuck, which one you would marry, and which one you would kill. It's kind of extreme, and the latest installment takes us to unheard of lengths with the ladies choosing between brilliant man-beast Philip Seymour Hoffman, lovable weasel William H. Macy, and John C. Reilly. For once, they reach the same conclusion, which includes the controversial decision to eff Philip Seymour Hoffman.


...the first scene of Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead, proved an easy target for people (mostly guys) to point out how “gross it is” to watch Hoffman naked, pumping Marisa Tomei from behind. It succeeded as vérité in that it showed what men look like when they are fucking. That shot of his gut resting on Tomei’s bare tuchus, wheezing his evil into her, reeked of a déjà vu realism that, if you fuck men, you couldn’t help but find yourself under the spell of. It made me feel feelings.

Wow. That makes me want to fuck him.

Be sure to check out past favorites which include Warren Beatty/Jack Nicholson/Dustin Hoffman and Bill Murray/Steve Martin/Chevy Chase.