ICARUS WAS AN IDIOT.
All Icarus had to do was escape the island of Crete. Thatâs it. And he even had help: Using wax and feathers, his father Daedalus painstakingly crafted Icarus a pair of wings.
âOkay, kid,â Daedalus said, handing his son those wondrous wings. âHereâs the deal: Donât fly into the ocean, because thatâll ruin the feathers. And donât fly too close to the sun, because thatâll ruin the wax. Pretty simple, right? You can handle that, right?â
âHa!â Icaraus laughed as he hugged his father. âOf course I can!â Then Icarus flew straight for the sun and the wax melted and he died.
For generations, Icarusâ idiocy has taught humankind an important lesson: Prudence and moderation serve us well.
Luckily for us, that lesson is useless during the Portland Mercuryâs first-ever Wing Weekâwhere nearly 20 of Portlandâs favorite restaurants will offer a half-dozen specially made wings for a mere $5! These wings? These wings are meant to be eaten. Which means we can ignore prudence and moderation and eat as many of âem as possible.
There are, of course, a few things to keep in mind as we fly through Wing Week:
â Tip, and tip well. Everyone at our Wing Week restaurants is working hard to make sure you get a great deal on wings. Let âem know you appreciate it, and donât be a cheapskate.
â Man cannot survive on wings alone! Okay, maybe technically he could? Even so, Wing Week restaurants are offering sides, drinks, and even special beers that go great with their wings. Donât miss out!
â Be cool. There will be linesâso be patient, come back the next day, or swing by at a less busy time. Or if youâre stuck in line, tell everyone that cool Icarus story! Theyâll be so impressed!
â #portlandwingweek. Stay tuned for updates, reviews, and tips on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. Something else we can learn from Icarus: Listening to other people is a good idea. Especially when it comes to the important things. Like wings.