DEPT. OF CORRECTIONS: There is, indeed, a Terminator-themed flavor of Slurpee, despite my earlier claims to the contrary. It’s apparently called “Apocalyptic Ice” (which is not a very good name, and certainly not as good as “Judge-Mint Day Juice”), and to add insult to injury, when I went to get one, the 7-Eleven on Broadway didn’t even have the flavor they were advertising outside. The closest thing they had was Crystal Light: Wild Cherry, which I refused to get on principle.

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With honor and distinction, Erik Henriksen served as the executive editor of the Portland Mercury from 2004 to 2020. He can now be found at henriksenactual.com.

3 replies on “So I Spoke Too Soon.”

  1. Or someone traveled FORWARD in time (from the past!) and drank all the Apocalyptic Ice, and then changed the present thereby changing the past and suddenly Michael Bay was dead.

    (I may have cooked the books on this theory)

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