The Mercury provides news and fun every single day—but your help is essential. If you believe Portland benefits from smart, local journalism and arts coverage, please consider making a small monthly contribution, because without you, there is no us. Thanks for your support!

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! The Mercury's SANDWICH WEEK is still going on—but only until Sunday, so make sure to grab an 8 dollar sandwich from top-notch spots around the city before it's too late. You can find all the details here

The only thing better than sandwiches? News roundups. So let's get into it.


• Portland City Council did as everyone expected and voted "aye" to ban daytime camping from city-owned property (you know, the plan that's going to be "impossible to comply with.") The only "no" vote came from Commissioner Carmen Rubio. But Commissioner Mingus Mapps didn't vote either, even though he supposedly supports the policy, because he's in Washington, D.C. on his transportation grindset. Seems a little convenient, if you ask me. Either way, the ordinance—which will be needlessly cruel AS WELL AS ineffective—passed. Our Courtney Vaughn has more

Former Oregon Governor Kate Brown will need to give a deposition in the class-action lawsuit that alleges she and other state officials acted with "reckless indifference" toward the health of people in Oregon prisons during the pandemic. The trial is set to start next summer.  

• The culture war wages on in southern Oregon: funding was just cut for Oregon State University's extension program in Josephine County because local commissioners and community members believe it to have a "woke agenda." It appears one inciting disagreement between OSU and critics in Josephine County happened over a 4-H shirt that featured a large cross. OSU officials wanted kids in 4-H to wear different shirts—the land-grant university has a very reasonable religious neutrality policy—which community members balked at, saying it's sad to "take God out of 4-H." Now, it seems that youth in Josephine County won't have access to 4-H at all. 

• If I may have a moment to kvetch: my allergies are sooo bad right now, and yours might be too—the Willamette Valley is experiencing record pollen counts. But as this Oregonian article points out, the going is a lot tougher for our pals in Eugene. Sorry, guys. 


• Pat Robertson, the disgustingly homophobic and bigoted televangelist, has died at 93. Robertson will be remembered for blaming gay people and feminists for 9/11 (among other terrible things he said) and essentially laying the groundwork for the modern conservative culture war ruining so many lives. MOVING ON.

Smoke from Canadian wildfires is still looming over New York and the eastern US, and it looks awful. While I understand the desire to scoff at these New Yorkers and their pathetically pink lungs ('cause out west, we've BEEN inhaling particulate matter), I would urge the fighting to stop so we can direct our wrath toward the real enemies. I'm talking about Chevron, BP, Shell, ExxonMobil, and the rest of their ilk, whose execs purposefully hid information about the climate crisis for decades and are continuing to sow the seeds of our planet's destruction in order to pad their pockets with a little more cash. You can't take it with you, folks, especially not where the Big Oil CEOs are going. 

• The orcas have struck again since I checked in on them last week: on Monday, five Iberian killer whales left a sailor stranded on Gibraltar after tossing his yacht around "like a rag doll." By the way, I'm designating myself the Mercury's official whale-watcher, so you can expect more updates on these marine animals whether you want them or not. 

• Federal prosecutors have formally notified Donald Trump that he's a target of their investigation into why he had those classified documents at Mar-a-Lago after leaving office in 2021. According to the New York Times, this is "the clearest signal yet that the former president is likely to face charges in the investigation." Good news, maybe, but I'm not holding my breath about this one. 

• Finally, it's almost Friday. May the rest of your week be as blissful as this seal covered in mud: