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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! Hope you loved yesterday's sun, because the clouds (and possible showers) return today with a high of 64. So stay inside and dream of the Mercury's PIZZA WEEK which begins this coming Monday, and will make you forget all about terrible weather with those delicious $3 slices! And now here's yet another seamless segue... into today's NEWS.


• Portland City Council has voted in favor of paying nearly $167,000 to settle a lawsuit alleging that Mayor Wheeler and city officials wrongly withheld tens of thousands of communications between each other in violation of public records laws. Turns out these texts were delivered via iMessage which were unable to be archived by the city's current public records system, and this is important: "Despite signing a city agreement pledging not to use iMessage, Wheeler and others used the program for years, effectively shielding his communications from the public eye." And worse still, the city was able to settle this case without admitting any wrongdoing. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

• Earlier this week, a Cowlitz County judge in Washington state overturned a ban on high capacity gun magazines, and in the 90 minutes before the state's Supreme Court could temporarily revive the ban, a Kelso gun store owner sold HUNDREDS of these deadly magazines to hundreds of customers. The ban is expected to get another hearing on April 17, and could be finally decided by the Washington Supremes. Naturally the gun shop owner is complaining that the state's ban is hurting his deadly weapon business—HOW DARE THEY??—and vows that if the ban holds, he'll take it to the Trump-friendly US Supreme Court (which could ensure that millions more innocent people and children are murdered for the enjoyment of an insecure person's hobby).

• While Washington state residents are excited about getting their very own In-N-Out burger, folks in nearby Beaverton are waiting to see if they'll get an In-N-Out of their own. The popular (I would call it "overrated") burger joint has had trouble gaining a permit to build in a lot at 10565 SW Beaverton Hillsdale Highway, due to being unable to meet land use requirements and concerns from neighbors that the business will lead to traffic backups and lotsa garbage. A final decision is expected in April—but maybe they could put one in that now empty downtown Portland Buffalo Wild Wings? (Overrated it may be... but still VASTLY BETTER than Wild Wings!)

• Don't miss Jenni Moore's very excellent new edition of HEAR IN PORTLAND, in which she shares must-hear info about Rapper Mat Randol's new EP "The World Keeps Spinning," an upcoming Jack London show featuring soul singer/songwriter Julia Logue backed by saxophonist BrandonLee Cierley, and lots more great stuff to cram in your ears!


• Former football star and acquitted murderer OJ Simpson has died at the age of 76 from prostate cancer, according to his family. While he as acquitted in 1995 of the brutal stabbing murders of his then wife Nicole Brown Simpson and her friend Ronald Goldman, he was later found civilly liable for both homicides. (So no "RIP" here.)

• Arizona Republicans are digging themselves even deeper into their self-created pile of shit, and are refusing calls to repeal the1864 law that criminalizes abortion statewide, unless the person's life is at risk. When Democrat and some Republican state lawmakers attempted to bring the topic up for discussion, GOP leadership immediately shut them down, prompting yells of "Shame! Shame!" from the Dems.

• Meanwhile, President Biden is using the idiocy exhibited by Arizona Republicans to his advantage, launching an advertising blitz across the state to highlight Trump's various stances on abortion and his ties to Christian extremists.

• Oh, and back on the topic of Trump... I'm just going to leave this one right here to speak for itself: "A New Hampshire county chair for Donald Trump’s presidential campaign lost his job as a police officer in 2006 after he threatened to kill his colleagues and rape the police chief’s wife in retaliation for his suspension for having a relationship with an underage high school girl, according to an internal report released last week upon orders from the New Hampshire Supreme Court." Sounds about right!

• And finally... and now, a live stream of the Mercury's weekly editorial meeting.