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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! 👋

Get ready to drool down the front of your shirt: Coming this Monday, it's the Mercury's WING WEEK, featuring $8 plates of delicious, savory wings cooked up by 70 (!) of the greatest restaurants on planet Portland! So run and change your shirt, and then let's visit the somewhat less delicious PLANET NEWS.

IN LOCAL NEWS:

• Today in City Council members who are hilariously FURIOUS for no good reason: Years after voters demanded that the city institute a community-led police oversight board, it looks like it's finally happening! BUT. When a local federal judge effectively stripped the current council from having any more authority over the selection and implementation of the board, pushing those decisions to January when Portland's new council takes over, folks like Mayor Wheeler and Commish Gonzalez lost their got-damned minds. I mean how dare that fancy-pants judge and his "judicial overreach" take away the last vestiges of power these narcissists have left? In short? RUDE. 😂 Our Courtney Vaughn has the details.

• Okay, I'll admit the Mercury has given Commissioner Mingus Mapps a lot of (well deserved) guff in the past. But this tweet? A+, sir. NO NOTES. 👏👏👏

• Evictions in Oregon's affordable housing units are going up, up, up, as post-pandemic effects sink in. According to Portland State University researchers, affordable housing landlords filed more than 1,200 eviction notices in the first half of this year—primarily due to the nonpayment of rent—which is on track to eclipse the 1,800 notices filed in 2023. For those who actually care about solving the homeless crisis, it's not enough to get people into housing, we have to keep them there.

• WHAT STINKS? That's the question authorities are trying to answer after a strong, pungent odor wafted down the I-5 corridor north of Vancouver, Washington, and into North Portland Tuesday and Wednesday. While yesterday's rain seems to have helped the stink dissipate, the odor remains a mystery, though the Cowlitz County Department of Emergency Management tested the air and found no traces of gas or anything unusual. That said, officials are recommending that if the stench returns, stay inside and shut the windows. 💩

• Comedian Tina Friml—a self-proclaimed "fully functioning disabled adult living in NYC" with cerebral palsy—is playing a sold-out show at Mississippi Studios this week, and we have a great interview with her which is simultaneously hilarious and educational as fuck. Check it out! 

IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:

• New York City mayor Eric Adams has been indicted on corruption charges following an investigation into suspected illegal foreign campaign donations from the Turkish government, and concerns that Adams pressured the fire department to okay an unsafe building being built for the Turkish consulate. Federal agents have searched the mayor's home, and the outcry for Adams to step down is growing. Adams claims that the charges being leveled against him are "entirely false."

• Hurricane Helene, which has been designated a giant, category two storm, is bearing down on the Gulf Coast and expected to make landfall in Tallahassee, Florida, this evening where it could turn into a Category 4 "unsurvivable" storm that could cause untold damage to the southeastern United States. Counties along the western and northwestern border of Florida are being advised to immediately evacuate.

• The US and its allies are calling for an immediate 21-day ceasefire in Israel's continuing bombardment of Hezbollah forces in Lebanon—which, as usual, is killing women and children civilians as well. Israel's Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu is reportedly completely ignoring all calls for peace.

• Need to stock up on COVID tests? YES, YOU DO. And once again the government is giving out four free tests to every American household—and you can sign up to get yours now at covidtests.gov. (I just ordered mine! It's not a race, but ya gotta get up pretty early in the morning to beat me! 💅)

• And finally... once again Chappell Roan has crawled into my head to tell the world exactly how I feel.

@pinkponyclubhouse I've never related to something more #chappellroan #wlw #midwestprincess #sports ♬ original sound - chappy