For those panicky people who thought that HUMP! was sold out—well, they were partially right. We were sold out… until yesterday when we added a BRAND NEW HUMP SCREENING! It’s this Friday at 4:30 pm (knock off work early to watch some hilarious/hot porn), but I bet ya big dope money that this one will sell out too!

GET YOUR TICKETS NOW FOR THE JUST ADDED FRIDAY, 4:30 PM HUMP SHOW—OR YOU KNOW, BE VERY DISAPPOINTED.

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Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)