Last week, Fox News decided to junk their long-running tagline โFair and Balancedโ for a new slogan, โMost Watched, Most Trustedโ… and without even asking for our opinion! Here are some very suitable taglines that we think would be a much better fit. (Youโre welcome, Fox News, and you owe us $150,000.)
โOver One Million Racist Grandpas Servedโ
โCloying and Moistโ
โSean Hannity Is a Buttholeโ
โGroping Blindly for Something That Sounds Like Truthโ
โDangling Jowls, Racist Howlsโ
โWe Set This Pile of Horseshit on Fire, and You Love Itโ
โThe Broadcast Equivalent of Putting a Lawn Jockey in Front of Your Houseโ
โHeyyy… We Have Those Same TruckNutzโ
โSinglehandedly Keeping Americaโs Bowtie Industry Afloat Since 1996โ
โBoys Will Be Boysโ
โDonโt Check… Just Trust Usโ
โWeโre Totally Not Racist ;)โ
โWait… Are Women Allowed to Be Reporters?โ
โThe Future Home of State Mediaโ
โThe Muslims Are a-Cominโ for Your Applesauce!โ
โBill OโReilly? Bill OโReilly Who?โ
โI Killed a Polar Bear with My Bare Handsโ
โFewer Harassers, Same Great Dog-Whistlesโ
โGoing to Start Using the N-Word Any Day Nowโ
โAmericaโs Locker Roomโ
โWe Have That One Gay Guy, So Weโre Good… Right?โ
โะขะตะฟะตัั ะฟัะตะฒัะฐัะธัะต ะทะพะปะพัะพ ะฒ ะฝะฐะปะธัะฝัะต ะดะตะฝัะณะธ!โ
โA Better Way to Lieโ
โAsk Your Uncle, He Knows Weโre Rightโ
โCucks R Usโ
โBlaming It on Obama Since 2008โ
โNews for Oldsโ
โHappily Fulfilling the Mission of Our Glorious Leaderโ
โGrabbing News by the Pussyโ