Sweet Softcore

Once upon a time, softcore meant much more than Skinemax. Oh, so very much more. There was true art behind it, you see. True beauty--beautiful tales, beautiful actors, beautiful photography. But now those days are gone, and all that remains of that golden era is the work of Radley Metzger, the übergenius of softcore, the grandfather of idle wanking.

The Lickerice Quartet (1970) A creepy married couple, along with their dreamy, pouty son, are obsessed with a stag film. One day, whilst in town, they come across the star of said film, and bring her back to their massive estate. Then there is touching. Metzger's best-known film, The Lickerice Quartet is the ultimate example of his oeuvre--sexy, creepy, and pretty. And dig that crazy library!

Score (1972) Swingers! A dinner party turns sexy as one couple seduces another, resulting in--gasp!--homosexuality and swapping. While not as gorgeous as Metzger's other films (imagine the look of those Calvin Klein ads from a few years back, the ones with underage kids in swank basements), Score rises in the ranks due to the hysterical depths the characters are willing to sink, along with the sheer unsexiness their supposedly sexy and kinky actions produce. Brilliant!

Radley Metzger also worked in hardcore porn under the name "Henry Paris," creating such classic porn flicks as The Opening of Misty Beethoven (1976), Barbara Broadcast (1977), and Maraschino Cherry (1978). All of these are also available on video.