Get ready for what could possibly be the best “bad lip reading” ever—Bella and Edward from Twilight! Unsurprisingly, this nonsense is not too far off from the truth. (Hey, I always prepare my seafood by punching it first.)


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Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)