AS HOUSE SHOWS GO this one's more like a house festival. Here's how it breaks down...

Show Me the Pink. Sexy fight songs. Sexy bike songs. Punk rock you can dance to and not feel like you're pony-ing out to "dance punk." Bury this band in the earth and consider them a time capsule for Portland 2006. Better yet, let them play.

LKN. Lauren Kathryn Newman stalks the stage like a thrashing shark. You know those painfully stiff bands that barely break a sweat while they strum out their too-serious, vanilla, honky-boy indierock? This is the direct and wonderful antithesis of that.

Jonny X and the Groadies. If this noise shredding, grindcore goth-destructo band were a pipe bomb it would decimate every bourgeois bar you hate in the Pearl, your shitty zombie neighbors, and all those shit-talking hipsters who vulture your every move. Just like that, "BAMMM!"

Gay Deceivers. The ghost of Brian Wilson says, "As many hits as we scored I wish our experimental stuff had been further off the page. Y'know, weirder. It's too late now but if I could've done something more like the Gay Decei—wait. Hold on. I'm not dead. Am I? I honestly can't tell."

Ghosting. If you think droning sound is boring, you haven't been washed over by Ghosting's lysergic sunshine. Swinging between sighs of robot breath and furious mushroom-cap terror, Ghosting has the kind of range that keeps you listening—sort of like this lineup. An all-around complete music experience. "Something for everyone," as goes the cheesedick cliché.