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Holy crap, it’s the greatest concert ever!
So great that they can’t even tell us what it is!
So great that the invite is a RSVP and “non-transferrable”!
So great that will be serving refreshments!

So, who do you think it is? U2? Travis Tritt? Limp Bizkit? Smashmouth?

The better question is, how many artists can still sell out an arena in a market this size? Even Lil Wayne—with his big ‘ole pile of cash, Grammy’s, and magazine covers—has not been able to sell out his Rose Garden concert next Thursday (there are still 100 Level seats available for that show).

Maybe this big announcement will save the arena concert world as we know it. If that’s the case, we all know who it’s going to be: Miley Cyrus.

End Hits: It’s U2. At least, that’s our guess.

Ezra Ace Caraeff is the former Music Editor for the Mercury, and spent nearly a third of his life working at the paper. More importantly, he is the owner of Olive, the Mercury’s unofficial office dog....

14 replies on “The Greatest Concert in the World is Coming to the Rose Garden. Maybe.”

  4. Oh…for a second I thought you meant Bubbles from The Wire, and I was all SHIT YEAH!! But I guess you mean Bubbles the chimp…so…okay, fine.

  7. Since I probably will be working at this show, I’d be quite pleased to know who it is. Based on the schedule, I’m sayin’ either that Allmans/Doobies extravaganza coming up, or the Lippizaner Stallions.

  9. Or, perhaps it’s Beyonce, since I’ve just been called to work that show at Key Arena, in Seattle. Funny: she didn’t require a special announcement last time she came here.

    Or y’know: it’s some stupid fucking show none of us were going to go see anyway. I can’t wait.

  11. I thought U2 was supposed to be doing a STADIUM tour since they’ve already done the whole “arena” bit for All That You Can’t Leave Behind.

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