Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
A. “Where’s my tractor!”
–Jasminelee, age 14
Q. What do you call a fairy that doesn’t wash?
A. Stinkerbell.
–Emily, age 7
Q. A lady took a bite out of a brownie and died. How?
A. There was a cockroach in the brownie. She saw it and had a heart attack.
–Katie, age 6
Q. Why did the electric eel get a punk haircut?
A. Because he wanted to shock his parents!
–Dani, age 11
Q. What is small, annoying, and ugly?
A. I don’t know, but it comes when I call my sister’s name.
–Kayla, age 12
A mushroom walks into a club and sees a really pretty girl. He finally asks her to dance with him. She says no, and he says to her, “Why not? I’m a fungi.” Get it? Fun-gi, fun guy.
–Kimberly, age 12
Q. Why didn’t the hotdog star in the movies?
A. The rolls weren’t good enough.
–Tim, age 9
Q. What is the cannibal’s favorite game?
A. Swallow the leader.
–Becca, age 7
Q. Why is Dracula so unpopular?
A. Because he sucks.
–Theo, age 11
Q. If you are American outside of the bathroom what are you when you are inside the bathroom?
A. European (you’re a peeing).
–Pam, age 10
Q. Why is a baby like a leech?
A. Because they suck.
–Theo, age 11
Q. What’s the difference between a blonde and a brick?
A. When you lay a brick, it doesn’t follow you around for two weeks whining. My dad told me that one.
–Graham, age 14
Q. How do you embarrass an archeologist?
A. Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from. My brother told me that one.
–Graham, age 14